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Grand Lake Bum

Keep up with the events around the Grand Lake Community! Enjoy the Random Observations from The Grand Lake Bum.

Grand Lake Bum
1234 Two Tree Island
Grand Lake, OK

Grand Lake Bum 4-17-16

The most exciting thing that has happened on Grand Lake for a few years was Friday’s big groundbreaking ceremony for the new Shangri-La Resort Hotel.  What a show!  Over 200 people showed up for the big event and it was packed with so many dignitaries that my pal Boyd said it reminded him of a Shriners meeting – by the time everybody got introduced, there was no time left for the program. Seriously, though, it was terrific.  It’s always fun to hear Eddy Gibbs’ vision for the future; and it was equally fun to hear one of Grand Lake’s biggest cheerleaders, former Oklahoma Governor George Nigh. With the Shangri-La Resort Hotel and the Cherokee Casino Grove both under construction, Grand Lake is BOOMING again. Not to mention the more than 250 new jobs the two facilities will provide. Life is good.

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After the Shangri-La groundbreaking, the weekend wind and clouds stuffed my tummy. One of my buddies decided to clean out his freezer Saturday – another on Sunday.  Fish fry and crawfish boil (might have been some alcohol involved, too – I can’t really remember).

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A new poll indicates only six percent of the general population trusts the news media.  That puts news outlets on about the same level of trustworthiness as Congress.  I should point out, however, the poll was done by the Chicago Tribune, a stalwart of mainstream media – so I’m not sure whether it’s accurate or not.

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I see where Bernie Sanders finally released his 2014 tax returns.  He made a little over $200,000 which my pal Andy Borowitz says amounts to about a ten-minute speech at Goldman Sachs.

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I guess I’ll never be rich because I just can’t seem to think far enough outside the box. Los Angeles Lakers superstar Kobe Bryant played his last NBA game last week, and every entrepreneur and hustler was trying to figure out a way to make a buck off of the event.  The most creative was the guy who posted a bag of air…really…a bag of air from the Staples Center captured during Kobe’s last game.  If you think we have a shortage of idiots to take advantage of, think again.  Bidding got to $15,000 before the wizards at eBay noticed and took down the post.

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The July Republican National Convention was already shaping up as the most entertaining new TV show of the year, but it got better this week.  Sarah Palin told the Associated Press she was going to crash the big convention if she wasn’t invited by the Republican National Committee.  She added that she did not expect an invitation from the RNC “because they’re afraid of what I would say.” Aren’t we all?

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For political junkies like me, the Presidential election is already like a great new TV series.  Now everybody’s getting cranky. A lot of Bernie supporters are saying they won’t vote for Hillary and a bunch of Trump backers say they won’t vote for anybody else.  I seem to remember the Hillary backers saying they would not vote for Obama in 2008.  Next thing I knew, she was Obama’s Secretary of State. We seem to forget this kind of self-serving crankiness happens every election.  Otherwise, instead of two major political parties, we would have four: Democrats, Republicans, Berners, and Trumpsters. This too shall pass.

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BEST POLITICAL BUMPER STICKER: Make Oklahoma OK Again.

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BEST SIGN SEEN THIS WEEK: Went to the Air & Space Museum, but there was nothing there.

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Have you noticed Cinco de Mayo falls on Taco Thursday this year? Woo-hoo!!

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LEGAL TIP OF THE WEEK (from Michael Haggerty): “If the TV show ‘Cops’ has taught me anything, it’s to stay away from people with blurry faces. They’re nothing but trouble.”

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DINING AND DRINKING BY WATER UPDATE: VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina is now open Fridays & Saturdays 11:00-9:00 and Sundays 11:00-7:00.

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A LITTLE BUDDHIST HUMOR: Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of callouses on his feet. He also at very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.  This made him…(wait for it) a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis. (Thanks to my pal, Wes Stringer, for sharing this one)

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GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy Birthday wishes go out this week to Greg Bolton, Larry Sanford, Jackie Moore, Jim Forrester, Boyd Ayer, Don Douglas, Gaines Dittrich, Phil Carrott, and Nina Landers.

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UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK:  Why do people pay money to go to the top of tall buildings, then put more money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

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BEST EVENTS OF THE WEEK: The Old Bulldog Band performs at Big Shots Saturday night raising money for the Community Crisis Center ($25-$35 – reservations recommended). The GEFFE Gala is also Saturday night at the Grove Civic Center. Vintage Hitchcock: A Live Radio Play continues its run at Playmakers in Grove (runs through May 1).

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GRAND LAKE WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: There’s plenty of live entertainment around the lake this weekend. On Monkey Island, it’s a huge Saturday night at Big Shots featuring the return of The Old Bulldog Band in a rare Grand Lake appearance, raising money for the Community Crisis Center ($25-$35 – reservations recommended). Randy Lunsford entertainsThursday-Sunday evenings at The Shebang and there’s karaoke on the Balcony Bar Friday & Saturday nights. Just down Highway 125, Friday night is also Karaoke Night at Monkey Island Pub, followed by the big Hee Haw/Rockabilly Costume Party Saturdaynight; and there’s always great entertainment at The Road Hog Saloon, as well.

If you’re in the Grove area, Randy Lunsford also entertains Tuesday and Wednesday evenings at Gabby’s in downtown Grove; and there’ll be great live music by Smoke and Moonshine both Friday and Saturday nights at J.R. Spanky’s (Highway 10 Northeast of Grove).

If you’re in the South Grand Lake area, Saturday night is Karaoke Night at Juan Montez at Red Arrow Marina; and both Jim Sweeney and Chris Campbell will perform live Saturday night at Pickles at the Lake, just north of Langley.

Area casinos have great options this weekend, as well. At Buffalo Run Casino’s Trailer Park Bar & Grill, The Sex will be on stageFriday with Dead Metal Society on stage Saturday. At the Downstream Casino’s Legends Sports Bar Retrorockerz will performFriday night followed by Joe Giles & the Homewreckers Saturday night. Lover’s Leap Lounge will feature the softer sounds ofKenny Babb both Friday & Saturday nights. At Bordertown Casino’s Lost Creek Saloon, Midwestern Playboys will provide the musical entertainment Friday night, followed by a great concert with Shooter Jennings with Waymore’s Outlaws Saturday night.  At Indigo Sky Casino, there is live entertainment in the Echo Bar beginning with Eddie Valen Thursday night, followed by Leather and Lace Friday night and The Uncrowned Kings Saturday. Lickitty Split will perform Saturday night at Grand Lake Casino. If comedy is your thing, it’s a great weekend at Loony Saloon at The Stables Casino. Quincy Carr will be on stage Friday & Saturday with special guest John Hilder.

The best spots to catch PGA play, NBA Playoff games, and NASCAR action are the Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La, Island Joe’s at Shangri-La Marina, Monkey Island Pub, the Standing Room Only Bar at The Shebang, Road Hog Saloon, Pickles at the Lake in Langley, Hookers at Cherokee Yacht Club and J.R. Spanky’s northeast of Grove.

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BUM MUST-SEE TV: Season 4 of Inside Amy Schumer premieres Thursday at 9:00 on Comedy Central, Season 6 of Game of Thrones starts Sunday night at 8:00 on HBO and Season 5 of Veep follows at 9:30, also on HBO.

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BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: Criminal and Compadres

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QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “I’m glad I learned about parallelograms in school instead of how to do taxes. It really came in handy this parallelogram season.” – Sage Boggs

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SAVE THE DATE: Friday-Sunday, April 29-May 1 – “Dare to Compare” Lakewide In-Water Boat Show. Thursday, May 5-Sunday, May 8 – Cinco de Mayo Weekend Fiesta at Juan Montez Restaurant and Bar at Red Arrow Marina. Friday, May 6 – GRDA Lake Launch at the Ecosystems Center in Langley. Saturday, May 7 – Burning of the Socks at 4:00 p.m. at Harbors View Marina. Sunday, May 8 – Mother’s Day Sunday Buffet at the Summit Restaurant at Shangri-La.

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It’s a good sports weekend, especially if you like basketball and the OKC Thunder. They have the Dallas Mavericks in the first round and continue play in Dallas Thursday night at 6:00 (TNT) and again Saturday night at 7:00 (ESPN). Toronto is at Indiana at 6:30Thursday (NBA) and at 2:00 Saturday (TNT). Golden State is at Houston Thursday night at 8:30 (TNT) and Sunday afternoon at2:30 (ABC). Cleveland is at Detroit Friday night at 6:00 (ESPN) and Sunday night (7:30 on TNT). Atlanta is in Boston Friday night at 7:00 (ESPN2) and Sunday afternoon at 5:00 (TNT). San Antonio takes on Memphis Friday night at 8:30 (ESPN) and Sunday atnoon (ABC). That wraps up the first four games for everybody. Action continues Monday in the series where additional games are needed.

PGA Golfers are in San Antonio this weekend for the Valero Texas Open.  Coverage is on the Golf Channel at 2:00 Thursday &Friday, and noon Saturday & Sunday.  CBS picks up the final two rounds at 2:00 Saturday & Sunday; and the NASCAR kids are in Richmond for the Toyota Owners 400 at noon Sunday on Fox.

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It looks like the April showers are going to give us a break for the weekend, then crank back up again Monday. Friday, Saturday &Sunday look fantastic with sunshine and highs in the mid-80s.  Get out there and enjoy all Grand Lake has to offer. I’ll see youSaturday night for The Old Bulldog Band fundraising performance at Big Shots.  Remember, though, wherever you choose to party, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you.  It could be me. 

GRAND LAKE BUM

 

Want more information on advertisers you see in the Grand Lake Bum?  No problem.  Just click on their ad and you will be connected to their web site.  If you would like to join the growing list of sponsors of The Grand Lake Bum e-blast and the Bum’s page on both and www.360grandlake.com, the cost is only $50 a week and the list of readers is growing.  E-mail or contact 360grandlake.com to sign up.

 

Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area?  Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.

 

American Grill in Grove

Aquabar & Grill at The Landings Marina on Monkey Island (smoking on the deck)

Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley (smoking in the bar)

Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)

Big Shots on Monkey Island (smoking upstairs—open Friday & Saturday nights)

Bobbers Café north of Langley on Highway 82

Book ‘ems at South Wind Marina in Bernice

Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La on Monkey Island (smoking on the patios)

Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)

Carlos Montez in Langley (smoking in bar)

Ceasar’s Place in Vinita and on Monkey Island

Chicken Coop in Langley

Clanton’s Café in Vinita

Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina

Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)

Drake’s Restaurant in Grove

Frosty & Edna’s (west of the dam in Langley)

Gabby’s Place in downtown Grove

Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)

Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)

Grand Lodge in Ketchum (smoking)

High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)

Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)

Iron Frog (Grove)

Island Joe's Kentena at Shangri-La Marina (smoking)

J.R. Spanky's on Highway 10 north of Grove (smoking)

Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina

Karrie's Kaboose in Vinita (smoking)

La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove

Lakeside Bar & Grill in Grove at Sail Boat Bridge

Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum

Los Garcias in Langley

Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove

Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)

Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)

Morrows Landing in Raper Hollow

Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove

Okie Smokies Barbecue in Grove on Hwy 59 South

Book ‘ems Restaurant & Pub at South Wind Marina in Bernice

Pickles at the Lake in Langley

Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)

Raggedy’s in Grove

Rancho Viejo in Grove

Riggs & Company in Langley

Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)

Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)

Scooters in Langley (smoking)

Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)

Smokin’ Spur BBQ & Trading Post at Old Towne Plaza, Cleora

Sticky Fingers Barbecue in Ketchum

Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)

Summit Restaurant at Shangri-La on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice

The Landings Marina (smoking on the deck)

The Landings Market and Grill on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)

The Office on Monkey Island (smoking)

The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)

The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)

Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)

VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)

Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove

Waterway Café, Harbors View Marina (smoking on breakwater dining deck)

Wolf Creek Diner in Grove

Wyandotte Nation Casino at Twin Bridges (smoking)

Grand Lake Bum 4-10-16

Except for Sunday’s 1,000 mph wind, Grand Lakers enjoyed a great weekend last weekend. Boaters were out, golf courses were full, and the clubs & restaurants were hopping! My pals who were at The Masters might have had a bigger weekend than I did – but not much. It sure was nice to see so many faces we haven’t seen for a few months.  People are BACK.  Grand Lake is booming once again.  The Cherokees have begun construction on a new casino at Tom Cat Corner and this Friday, Shangri-La breaks ground for a new resort hotel on Monkey Island, scheduled for opening April, 2017.  It’s going to be incredible.  Life gets better every week on Grand Lake!

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Did you read about Benjamin Grafius?  He’s sort of a thinking man’s criminal. Charged with several counts of exposing himself to others near New Holland, Pennsylvania, he admitted that he had targeted residents of the Amish community.  Why? “I knew they wouldn’t have telephones to call the police.”

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A complete analysis of various ratings puts Grove at the #1 best place to retire in Oklahoma!  Grand Lake’s largest city was followed by Oklahoma City, Guthrie, Eufaula, and Stillwater to round out the Top 5.  According to onlyinyourstate.com, Grove was also ranked in the Top 5 places to retire nationally! Congratulations to us. Congratulations to you, too, if you have kids or grandkids in school in the Jenks School District which was determined by education ranking company Niche and Business Insider last week as the “Best School District in Oklahoma” last week.

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Sometimes things just don’t go your way – no matter how much you prepare.  An 86-year-old woman in Pennsylvania had signed up for a medical alert necklace because she didn’t want to be caught in a life-threatening emergency without help. Unfortunately, when she tripped, the medical alert necklace got caught in her walker and strangled her. #justnotyourday

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Truck wreck Karma?  Two semi-tractor trailer rigs collided on I-95 in Florida, spilling their contents all over the highway to the delight of passersby. One truck carried Fritos, the other, Busch Beer.  PARTY!

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If you bought those “Forever Stamps” from the U.S. Postal Service in order to avoid future rate increases – GOTCHA!  You avoided the postal rate decrease that happened over the weekend. Some government group appropriately named the Postal Regulatory Commission has ruled that the last postal rate increase was actually a “surcharge,” and has run its course. Whether the Postal Service will continue to run your course remains to be seen.  The U.S. Postmaster says the ill-advised rate cut will cost USPS $2 billion a year. You get two cents. First Class postage went from 49-cents to 47-cents over the weekend.  Now, when you buy a stamp, you’ll have to decide what to do with three left-over pennies instead of just one.

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Well, here’s an embarrassing moment for Presidential candidate Donald Trump. Two of his kids won’t be able to vote for him in New York’s Presidential primary next week because…they failed to register as Republicans to vote in the closed primary.  Only Donald Trump, Jr. is a registered Republican voter.  Little Barron isn’t old enough to vote, and Eric and Ivanka….I don’t know….forgot? Don’t support their dad?  Or maybe they’re as surprised as the rest of us that he’s still in the race for the New York primary.

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Brianne Altice is a school teacher in Utah – or at least she was before she went to prison for having sexual relations with three of her students. She’s now trying to argue that the sexual relationship must have been beneficial to at least one of the students because his grades improved.  Well, OF COURSE, his grades improved.  She was his teacher, for heaven’s sake (although it is still unclear exactly what he was being graded for).

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George Mason University lit up the Twitter world last week when it renamed its law school – temporarily.  The university had announced it was renaming the school after the late Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia – the “Antonin Scalia School of Law.” The Twitter world quickly lit up with the unintentional acronym, and the university withdrew the name change, thereby depriving future generations from references to legal training from the “ASSoL at George Mason.” (Think about it. You have to say it out loud.)

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DEFINITION OF THE WEEK: Immature: a word boring people use to describe fun people.

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BEST FACEBOOK POST: Hyphenated. Non-hyphenated. The irony.

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LEGAL TIP OF THE WEEK (from Josh Davis): “If you’re going to lie to the cops about what your name is, try not to give them the name of someone with multiple felony warrants.”

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DINING AND DRINKING BY WATER UPDATE: Juan Montez is open at Red Arrow Marina – Thursday is “Taco Thursday.” Island Joe’s Kentena at Shangri-La Marina is now open for lunch and dinner Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Open at 11:00 a.m. Also, Chef Tom says he’ll have his famous Mahi starting this week!

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GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy Birthday wishes go out this week to Jack Moore, Jackie Moore, Tripp Markwell, Mark Nichols, Doug Frans, Ron Lay, Debbie Littlefield, Tim Howson, Liz Paden, Vicki Howard, Jason Faulconer, Jeff Spielmann, Kevin Severe, Don Bullard, Steve Long, Linda Fieth, Larry Sanford, Bobby Brewer, and Dave Wagenblatt.

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UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK:  Why isn’t phonics spelled phonetically?

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BEST EVENTS OF THE WEEK: Shangri-La Golf Club, Resort & Marina hosts formal groundbreaking ceremonies for a new Resort Hotel at 1:00 p.m. Friday at the hotel site, adjacent to Shangri-La Marina. The Shangri-La Men’s Golf Association kicks off the 2016 season with their Spring Scramble Saturday morning at 9:00. Vintage Hitchcock: A Live Radio Play opens Saturday at Playmakers in Grove (runs through May 1). Sunday afternoon at 1:00 – auction of The Casitas. Buy a cozy cabin…or an entire resort. Should be fun.

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GRAND LAKE WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: There’s plenty of live entertainment around the lake this weekend. On Monkey Island, Randy Lunsford entertains Thursday-Sunday evenings at The Shebang and there’s fabulous dance music at Big Shots Friday & Saturday nights. Just down Highway 125, there’s always great entertainment at Monkey Island Pub and The Road Hog Saloon.

If you’re in the Grove area, Randy Lunsford also entertains Tuesday and Wednesday evenings at Gabby’s in downtown Grove; and there’ll be great live music by Southbound Sites Friday followed by Dewayne Bowman Saturday night at J.R. Spanky’s (Highway 10 Northeast of Grove).

Area casinos have great options this weekend, as well. At Buffalo Run Casino’s Trailer Park Bar & Grill, Earl & Them will be on stage Friday with The Sex on stage Saturday. Blues Traveler will be in concert Saturday night at The Pavilion at Downstream Casino Casino. Also, at the Downstreams’s Legends Sports Bar Ace’s Wild will perform Friday night followed by Pearl Saturdaynight. Lover’s Leap Lounge will feature the softer sounds of Howard Gayles both Friday & Saturday nights. At Bordertown Casino’s Lost Creek Saloon, Dewayne Bowman will provide the musical entertainment Friday night, followed by StonehorseSaturday night.  At Indigo Sky Casino, there is live entertainment in the Echo Bar beginning with Erin Michelle Thursday night, followed by Oreo Blue Friday night and Pralandra Saturday. If comedy is your thing, it’s a great weekend at Loony Saloon at The Stables Casino. Eric Hunter will be on stage Friday & Saturday with special guest Brett James.

If you’re in the Vinita area, Lickitty Split will perform at the Vinita American Legion Saturday night.

The best spots to catch PGA play, NBA Playoff games, and NASCAR action are the Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La, Island Joe’s at Shangri-La Marina, Monkey Island Pub, the Standing Room Only Bar at The Shebang, Road Hog Saloon, Pickles at the Lake in Langley, Hookers at Cherokee Yacht Club and J.R. Spanky’s northeast of Grove.

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BUM MUST-SEE TV: Season 2 of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt is available on NetFlix beginning Friday. Confirmation isSaturday night at 7:00 on HBO and Julia Louis-Dreyfus is the host of Saturday Night Live (10:30 Saturday on NBC).  Daniel Tosh: People Pleaser is Sunday night at 9:00 on Comedy Central.

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BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: The Jungle Book and Barbershop: The Next Cut

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QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “At this point, it’s hard to tell who poses more of a threat to Hillary’s campaign – Bernie Sanders or Bill Clinton.” – Andy Borowitz

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SAVE THE DATE: Saturday, April 23 – Old Bulldog Band at Big Shots on Monkey Island raising money for the Community Crisis Center. Saturday, April 23 – Grove Education Foundation for Excellence (GEFFE) Gala at the Grove Civic Center. Friday-Sunday, April 29-May 1 – “Dare to Compare” Lakewide In-Water Boat Show. Thursday, May 5-Sunday, May 8 – Cinco de Mayo Weekend Fiesta at Juan Montez Restaurant and Bar at Red Arrow Marina. Friday, May 6 – GRDA Lake Launch at the Ecosystems Center in Langley. Saturday, May 7 – Burning of the Socks at 4:00 p.m. at Harbors View Marina. Sunday, May 8 – Mother’s DaySunday Buffet at the Summit Restaurant at Shangri-La.

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It’s a good sports weekend, especially if you like basketball and the OKC Thunder. The NBA Playoffs get underway this weekend with four first round games Saturday (2:00 on ABC, 4:30, 7:00 and 9:30 on ESPN) and another Sunday afternoon at 2:00 (ABC).

On the heels of The Masters, PGA Golfers are at Hilton Head, South Carolina this weekend for the RBC Heritage.  Coverage is on the Golf Channel at 2:00 Thursday & Friday, and noon Saturday & Sunday.  CBS picks up the final two rounds at 2:00 Saturday &Sunday.

The NASCAR drivers are at Bristol this week and back to Sunday afternoon driving.  Coverage of the Food City 500 begins atnoon Sunday on Fox…and the 2016 Major League Baseball season is officially underway.

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It looks like the perfect weekend to break ground for a new Resort Hotel on Grand Lake. Friday’s forecast is sunshine and a high of 80 – and that pretty much continues through the perfect weekend.  Get out there and enjoy all Grand Lake has to offer; and remember, wherever you choose to party, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you.  It could be me. 

GRAND LAKE BUM

 

Want more information on advertisers you see in the Grand Lake Bum?  No problem.  Just click on their ad and you will be connected to their web site.  If you would like to join the growing list of sponsors of The Grand Lake Bum e-blast and the Bum’s page on both and www.360grandlake.com, the cost is only $50 a week and the list of readers is growing.  E-mail or contact 360grandlake.com to sign up.

 

Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area?  Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.

 

American Grill in Grove

Aquabar & Grill at The Landings Marina on Monkey Island (smoking on the deck)

Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley (smoking in the bar)

Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)

Big Shots on Monkey Island (smoking upstairs—open Friday & Saturday nights)

Bobbers Café north of Langley on Highway 82

Book ‘ems at South Wind Marina in Bernice

Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La on Monkey Island (smoking on the patios)

Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)

Carlos Montez in Langley (smoking in bar)

Ceasar’s Place in Vinita and on Monkey Island

Chicken Coop in Langley

Clanton’s Café in Vinita

Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina

Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)

Drake’s Restaurant in Grove

Frosty & Edna’s (west of the dam in Langley)

Gabby’s Place in downtown Grove

Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)

Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)

Grand Lodge in Ketchum (smoking)

High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)

Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)

Iron Frog (Grove)

Island Joe's Kentena at Shangri-La Marina (smoking)

J.R. Spanky's on Highway 10 north of Grove (smoking)

Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina

Karrie's Kaboose in Vinita (smoking)

La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove

Lakeside Bar & Grill in Grove at Sail Boat Bridge

Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum

Los Garcias in Langley

Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove

Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)

Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)

Morrows Landing in Raper Hollow

Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove

Okie Smokies Barbecue in Grove on Hwy 59 South

Book ‘ems Restaurant & Pub at South Wind Marina in Bernice

Pickles at the Lake in Langley

Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)

Raggedy’s in Grove

Rancho Viejo in Grove

Riggs & Company in Langley

Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)

Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)

Scooters in Langley (smoking)

Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)

Smokin’ Spur BBQ & Trading Post at Old Towne Plaza, Cleora

Sticky Fingers Barbecue in Ketchum

Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)

Summit Restaurant at Shangri-La on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice

The Landings Marina (smoking on the deck)

The Landings Market and Grill on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)

The Office on Monkey Island (smoking)

The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)

The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)

Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)

VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)

Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove

Waterway Café, Harbors View Marina (smoking on breakwater dining deck)

Wolf Creek Diner in Grove

Wyandotte Nation Casino at Twin Bridges (smoking)

Grand Lake Bum 3-27-16

I hope you had a great Easter weekend!  Saturday was a good day for boating and Sunday was a good day for eating and drinking. I did my share of both!  Now, it’s on to the big weekend ahead with the Grand Dam Run, the Bootleggers Ball, and my pal Wayne’s big karaoke birthday bash at Big Shots. If you’re not already in drinking shape for the Grand Lake season, you’d better get to work!

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Spring is here and that must mean the arrival of the inconsiderate.  I saw three guys walking their dogs on a perfectly manicured golf course over the weekend.  I didn’t know golf courses could also double as dog parks, but I guess they must. Why not?  I’m sure golfers look forward to stepping in stuff like that.  I could be worse, I guess.  They could be walking their horses.

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While everyone else is worried about the Presidential race, state and national elections, terrorism around the world, the fight against ISIS and frightening budget cuts for health and education programs, Grand Lake is in a major fight over trash.  The folks in Zena took after local trash officials like Trump supporters after protesters last week when “green boxes” for trash started disappearing. Garbage fights!  They were even armed.  Our Island Joe’s crew has been trying to think of a name for this group to pass along to my buddy the Woodard Hollow Waterspout.  I think we’ve got it – “Zena Lives Matter.”

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As a rule, firearms are not allowed in the Quicken Loans Arena in Cleveland.  However, more than 30,000 people have now signed a petition asking that guns be allowed in the building for the Republican National Convention there in July.  Sure. What could go wrong?

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If the National Enquirer story about Ted Cruz’ extramarital sexual exploits is true… ewwwww!  Let’s go back to talking about the size of Donald Trump’s penis. That’s a less disturbing visual than Ted Cruz having sex.

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Just in case you think folks are generally sort of smart, here’s proof to the contrary  Following President Obama’s historic trip to Cuba, the satirical publication The Onion published a picture and a headline indicating hundreds of Cubans hung on to the wings of Air Force One to hitch an unauthorized ride with the President out of Cuba and into the United States.  The saddest thing is not necessarily the fact that so many people thought the story was true that the fact-check site Snopes.com had to list the item and declare it “false.”  The saddest thing is that the people who believed that story might also vote. Or run for office themselves!

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Are you kidding me?  In Kansas, legislators have introduced a proposed law that would give students the right to sue their school for $2,500 if they can spot a transgender student in the restroom.  With the Kansas budget in free-fall, it seems kind of weird to put priorities on legislation to urge students to look at the private parts of other students.  Spot a penis – win a prize!

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I guess Sarah Palin is out as a potential player in a Donald Trump administration.  She has signed a deal to host her own fake court television “reality” show beginning in early 2017.  No, seriously.  Apparently you don’t have to have any legal experience to be a judge on TV. So, here comes Judge Sarah. #kindalikejerryspringer

*****

Surprise, surprise, surprise.  The U.S. Supreme Court has ruled that Oklahoma is not in charge of Colorado.  Oklahoma Attorney General Scott Pruitt said Colorado’s legalization of marijuana was like a drug cartel that is causing problems elsewhere. The Supreme Court refused to even hear the case.  So, while Colorado is raking in millions and millions of additional tax dollars, Oklahoma continues to waste what little resources we have filing frivolous lawsuits against them.

*****

BEST FACEBOOK POST: Just before I die, I’m going to swallow an entire bag of popcorn kernels.  My cremation is going to be epic!

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BEST SIGN SEEN THIS WEEK: “Anal Easter Egg Hunt Saturday” (be vewwwy careful)

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LEGAL TIP OF THE WEEK (from Michael Haggerty): “If you’re going to keep a baseball bat in your car, also keep a glove. Your lawyer will thank you.”

*****

GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy Birthday wishes go out this week to Anna Pickens, Cliff Cook, Becky Sconyers, Grant Forkner, Diana Stephens, Mike Farley, Wayne Smith, Sam Walker, Erin Gayer, Clay Hartley, Jason “Sodie” Woolard, Tod Sanger, and Brian Edwards! Congratulations to Cherokee Nation Entertainment on their Monday groundbreaking ceremonies for construction of the new Cherokee Casino Grove! Next up? The April 15th groundbreaking for the Shangri-La Resort Hotel.  Things are hopping at Grand Lake! And, of course, I have a special shout-out to my Oklahoma Sooners, the first school in NCAA history to have its football team make the playoffs and its basketball team make the Final Four in the same year.  Good luck against VillanovaSaturday – and BEYOND!

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UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK:  Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

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BEST EVENTS OF THE WEEK: It’s a big weekend on Grand Lake this weekend.  Saturday is the annual Grand Dam Run at the Pensacola Dam. Saturday night is the South Grand Lake Area Chamber of Commerce Bootleggers Ball at Cherokee Yacht Club. Saturday night is also Wayne Smith’s 3rd annual Karaoke Party and Birthday Bash at Big Shots Rhythm & Booze.  Looks like a really fun weekend (and a long Saturday night).

*****

GRAND LAKE WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: There’s plenty of live entertainment around the lake this weekend. On Monkey Island, Randy Lunsford entertains Thursday-Sunday evenings at The Shebang and there’s fabulous dance music at Big Shots Friday & Saturday nights. DJ Scott from Black Tie Entertainment will have all the dance music Saturday night at the Monkey Island Pub. There’s also live entertainment Saturday nights at the Road Hog Saloon. If you’re on South Grand Lake, this Friday night is a Karaoke Friday Night at Pickles at the Lake just south of Langley, and there will be great live jazz/swing music at the Bootleggers Ball at Cherokee Yacht Club Saturday night.

If you’re in the Grove area, Randy Lunsford also entertains Tuesday and Wednesday evenings at Gabby’s in downtown Grove; and there is live music both Friday and Saturday nights at J.R. Spanky’s (Highway 10 Northeast of Grove).

Area casinos have great options this weekend, too. At Buffalo Run Casino’s Trailer Park Bar & Grill, The Band DeLorean will be on stage both Friday & Saturday nights. At Downstream Casino’s Legends Sports Bar Audio Crush will perform Friday night followed by Southern Ground Saturday night. Lover’s Leap Lounge will feature the softer sounds of Howard Gayles both Friday &Saturday nights. At Bordertown Casino’s Lost Creek Saloon, Southern Ground will provide the musical entertainment Friday night, followed by Dirty Saints Saturday night.  At Indigo Sky Casino, there is live entertainment in the Echo Bar beginning with The Roadhouse Roosters Thursday night, followed by Earl & Them Friday night and Boombox Revival Saturday. If comedy is your thing, it’s a great weekend at Loony Saloon at The Stables Casino.  Carl Yard will be on stage Friday & Saturday with special guestTerry McNeely.

The best spots to catch NCAA Final Four games, NBA games, along with NASCAR and PGA action are the Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La, Monkey Island Pub, the Standing Room Only Bar at The Shebang, Road Hog Saloon, Pickles at the Lake in Langley, Hookers at Cherokee Yacht Club and J.R. Spanky’s northeast of Grove.

                                                                      *****

BUM MUST-SEE TV: The season premiere of Motive is Friday night at 9:00 on USA.  CBS Sunday Morning airs at 9:00 a.m. on CBS Sunday, and the Association of Country Music Awards Show is Sunday night at 7:00 on CBS.

*****

BUM MUST-SEE MOVIE: Eye in the Sky

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QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “This is how crazy this Presidential election is: a Latino and an old Jew can’t win in Florida.” – Larry Wilmore on The Nightly Show

*****

SAVE THE DATE: Saturday, April 9 – Shangri-La Women’s Golf Association Spring Luncheon at the Summit Restaurant. Friday, April 15 at 1:00 p.m. – official groundbreaking ceremonies for the new Shangri-La Resort Hotel. Saturday, April 16 – Shangri-La Men’s Golf Association Scramble. Saturday, April 16-May 1Vintage Hitchcock: A Live Radio Play at Playmakers in Grove.Saturday, April 23 – Old Bulldog Band at Big Shots on Monkey Island raising money for the Community Crisis Center. Saturday, April 23 – Grove Education Foundation For Excellence (GEFFE) Gala at the Grove Civic Center. Friday-Sunday, April 29-May 1 – “Dare to Compare” Lakewide In-Water Boat Show. Saturday, May 7 – Burning of the Socks at 4:00 p.m. at Harbors View Marina.

*****

The NCAA Road to the Final Four comes to an end in Houston this weekend.  Semi-final games will be Saturday at 5:00 and 8:00 p.m. (Oklahoma plays Villanova Saturday in the semi-finals) with the Championship settled Monday night at 8:00.  All games are on TBS.

The OKC Thunder have a couple of appearances on national television this week, starting late Thursday hosting the L.A. Clippers at8:30 on TNT. Sunday, they’re on the road taking on the Rockets in Houston on ABC at 2:30 before heading for Denver and aTuesday night game at 8:00 on FSOK. Other great NBA games on the tube this week include Chicago at Houston Thursday night (6:00 on TNT), then a Friday night double-header featuring Cleveland at Atlanta (7:00) and Boston at Golden State (9:30), both on ESPN.

The PGA pros are in Houston this weekend for the Shell Houston Open.  Coverage begins on the Golf Channel at 3:00 Thursday &Friday and at noon Saturday & Sunday.  NBC picks up coverage of the final two days of play at 2:00 Saturday & Sunday.

The NASCAR drivers are back at work this weekend in Martinsville for the STP 500.  Coverage is at noon Sunday on Fox Sports 1.

*****

We have a really nice weekend ahead of us with sunshine and high temperatures in the mid-to-upper 60s – and reasonable wind. There are a lot of fun activities on the lake this weekend. Get out there and enjoy all Grand Lake has to offer; and remember, wherever you choose to party, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you.  It could be me. 

GRAND LAKE BUM

 

Want more information on advertisers you see in the Grand Lake Bum?  No problem.  Just click on their ad and you will be connected to their web site.  If you would like to join the growing list of sponsors of The Grand Lake Bum e-blast and the Bum’s page on both and www.360grandlake.com, the cost is only $50 a week and the list of readers is growing.  E-mail or contact 360grandlake.com to sign up.

 

Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area?  Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.

 

American Grill in Grove

Aquabar & Grill at The Landings Marina on Monkey Island (smoking on the deck)

Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley (smoking in the bar)

Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)

Big Shots on Monkey Island (smoking upstairs—open Friday & Saturday nights)

Bobbers Café north of Langley on Highway 82

Book ‘ems at South Wind Marina in Bernice

Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La on Monkey Island (smoking on the patios)

Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)

Carlos Montez in Langley (smoking in bar)

Ceasar’s Place in Vinita and on Monkey Island

Chicken Coop in Langley

Clanton’s Café in Vinita

Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina

Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)

Drake’s Restaurant in Grove

Frosty & Edna’s (west of the dam in Langley)

Gabby’s Place in downtown Grove

Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)

Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)

Grand Lodge in Ketchum (smoking)

High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)

Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)

Iron Frog (Grove)

Island Joe's Kentena at Shangri-La Marina (smoking)

J.R. Spanky's on Highway 10 north of Grove (smoking)

Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina

Karrie's Kaboose in Vinita (smoking)

La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove

Lakeside Bar & Grill in Grove at Sail Boat Bridge

Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum

Los Garcias in Langley

Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove

Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)

Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)

Morrows Landing in Raper Hollow

Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove

Okie Smokies Barbecue in Grove on Hwy 59 South

Book ‘ems Restaurant & Pub at South Wind Marina in Bernice

Pickles at the Lake in Langley

Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)

Raggedy’s in Grove

Rancho Viejo in Grove

Riggs & Company in Langley

Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)

Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)

Scooters in Langley (smoking)

Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)

Smokin’ Spur BBQ & Trading Post at Old Towne Plaza, Cleora

Sticky Fingers Barbecue in Ketchum

Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)

Summit Restaurant at Shangri-La on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice

The Landings Marina (smoking on the deck)

The Landings Market and Grill on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)

The Office on Monkey Island (smoking)

The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)

The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)

Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)

VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)

Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove

Waterway Café, Harbors View Marina (smoking on breakwater dining deck)

Wolf Creek Diner in Grove

Wyandotte Nation Casino at Twin Bridges (smoking)

Grand Lake Bum 3-20-16

Now that we everybody has finished driving up and down the rocks below the Pensacola Dam at the annual Big Meat Run (keeping score of the winning competitors by the number of broken axles), we’re officially in the springtime mode.  I had no idea there were so many vehicles that climb rocks – or so many people who watched them climb rocks. If the lake ever runs dry, they can just expand the Meat Run.

*****

I got current on all my immunizations Saturday night at the big “First Day of Spring Party” at Big Shots where Joyce Duke and Dr. Phil U. Upp were giving free shots to combat the spread of Spring Fever! Fun night. Now, it’s on to Easter Sunday which I plan to celebrate in the manner it was intended – watching the Elite Eight games in the NCAA Tournament.

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A handful of our local law enforcement folks have already begun to gear up with their official Grand Lake Tourism Prevention Program.  What the hell is wrong with these guys?  The Corvette Club, which travels in a pack around America, came to Grand Lake to visit over the weekend.  Most everywhere they go, local law enforcement officers block off traffic so they can stick together in an uninterrupted display of classic beauty.  Not at Bernice, though.  Nope, quite the contrary.  They caught ‘em trying to stay together by slowly rolling through a stop sign – so, of course, they ticketed them. Sheesh! Welcome to Grand Lake.

*****

Microsoft has made a big deal out of trying to hire more women, but this probably isn’t what most women had in mind.  The women they hired for the Game Developers Conference after-party in San Francisco last week were sort of young…and sort of scantily clad…and were also paid to “socialize” with attendees.  That brings the definition of Microsoft’s policy to “be more inclusive toward women in gaming” to a new level.  A very low one. I guess they’re sorta like men, in a way.  I always explain to folks that I really do have a lot of class.  It’s just all low.

*****

Hulk Hogan continues to be the champ.  Somebody videotaped him having sex with a neighbor and sold it to the controversial website Gawker, which got 8 million views of the video. Last week, a jury awarded Hogan with $115 million in damages. Best payday ever! He had sued for $100 million, but the jury did think that was enough for the Hulkster.  Some guys have all the luck.

*****

Do you “tweet”? Believe it or not, this week is the tenth anniversary of Twitter.  The first tweet, sent by founder Jack Dorsey on March 21, 2006 was not as caustic as ones sent today. The text read, “Just setting up my twttr.”  Hard to believe that caught on.

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USELESS INFORMATION: Due to an unusual calendar rule having to do with Leap Year, spring arrived early this year.  Normally, the first day of spring is March 20 or 21, but it arrived at 11:30 CDT Saturday night, March 19 this year.  That’s the earliest beginning of spring since 1896.  It was a good enough reason for me to celebrate!

*****

The most ridiculous political statement in the past week, believe it or not, did not come from a Presidential candidate.  It came from Michigan Governor Rick Snyder, largely to blame for poisoning the water in Flint, Michigan. Since 81 temporary workers were hired to hand out bottled water so Flint residents didn’t have to drink the poison water, Governor Snyder actually had the nerve to point out the poison water had spurred job growth.  You can’t make this stuff up!

*****

Star struck…and jailed.  The dumb-ass in Phoenix who broke into a Bank of America ATM would have gotten away cleanly, except he spotted movie star Bill Murray who was in town visiting friends.  He stopped to talk with Murray about his latest movie, giving witnesses and police a chance to catch up. You can’t fix stupid.

*****

President Obama seems to have the same foreign travel luck I have.  He finally schedules a trip to the hottest new Caribbean destination – the first President to visit Cuba in 88 years, no less.  He finally lands…and it’s raining.

*****

BEST FACEBOOK POST: Many people don’t know this, but it’s possible to read something you don’t agree with on the internet and simply move on with your life.

*****

BEST SIGN SEEN THIS WEEK: “Ban pre-shredded cheese.  Make America grate again.”

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LEGAL TIP OF THE WEEK (from Josh Davis): “If you're going to shoplift, try not to walk out with a 55 inch flat screen awkwardly sticking out of your cart. In front of a cop. While on probation for stealing. Remember kids, subtlety is a virtue.”

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GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy Birthday wishes go out this week to Todd Segress, Matt Moyer, Ryan Dalton, William Cook, Jana Kimball, Charles Gragg, Mandi Long Dalton, Kathi Sikorski, and Andy Stewart.

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UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK:  Why doesn’t the fattest man in the world become a hockey goalie?

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BEST EVENTS OF THE WEEK: Wednesday night, March 23, there’s a Pajama Party Night at The Shebang with guest chef Judie Clark cooking up the quiche, grits, strawberry salad and parfait dessert. There’s a Karaoke Party at Monkey Island Pub Fridaynight, followed by Saturday night’s Wild Hare Party at Big Shots, and Easter Sunday Brunch at the Summit Restaurant at Shangri-La!

*****

GRAND LAKE WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: There’s plenty of live entertainment around the lake this weekend. On Monkey Island, Randy Lunsford entertains Thursday-Sunday evenings at The Shebang and Saturday night is the Wild Hare Party at Big Shots. It’s a big Karaoke Party Friday night at the Monkey Island Pub, and there’s always great live entertainment Saturdaynights at the Road Hog Saloon. If you’re on South Grand Lake, the great Jim Sweeney will be on stage Saturday night at Pickles at the Lake just south of Langley.

If you’re in the Grove area, Randy Lunsford also entertains Tuesday and Wednesday from evenings at Gabby’s in downtown Grove; and the great Western Justice Band will be on stage both Friday and Saturday nights at J.R. Spanky’s (Highway 10 Northeast of Grove).

Area casinos have great options this weekend, too. At Buffalo Run Casino’s Peoria Showplace, there’s Friday night Shobox boxing, a televised event featuring the Four State Franchise. At Buffalo Run’s Trailer Park Bar & Grill, The Sex will be on stage bothFriday & Saturday nights. At Downstream Casino’s Legends Sports Bar The Texas Blues Butchers will perform both Friday andSaturday nights. Lover’s Leap Lounge will feature the softer sounds of Kenny Babb both Friday & Saturday nights. At Bordertown Casino’s Lost Creek Saloon, Black Ridge will provide the musical entertainment Friday night, followed by Shawna Russell Saturdaynight.  At Indigo Sky Casino, there is live entertainment in the Echo Bar beginning with The Bobby D Trio Thursday night, followed by Donnie Ray Stephens Friday night and Sweet Trouble Saturday. Area favorite Lickitty Split will entertain Saturday night at Grand Lake Casino. If comedy is your thing, it’s a great weekend at Loony Saloon at The Stables Casino.  Ron Josol will be on stage Friday & Saturday with special guest Jay Dee.

The best spots to catch NCAA Basketball, NBA games, and PGA action are the Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La, Monkey Island Pub, the Standing Room Only Bar at The Shebang, Road Hog Saloon, Pickles at the Lake in Langley, Hookers at Cherokee Yacht Club and J.R. Spanky’s northeast of Grove.

                                                                      *****

BUM MUST-SEE TV: Series premiere of The Catch is Thursday night at 9:00 on ABC.  Spring Broke, an outrageous documentary on the history of Spring Break at Daytona airs Friday night at 8:00 on Showtime.

*****

BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: Batman vs. Superman: The Dawn of Justice and My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2.

*****

QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “Maserati is recalling 28,000 cars due to a potential problem with premature acceleration.  Of course, the men who drive Maseratis generally suffer from the same problem.” – Jimmy Fallon

*****

SAVE THE DATE: Saturday, April 2 – Grand Dam Run at the Pensacola Dam. Saturday, April 2 – South Grand Lake Chamber’s Bootleggers’ Ball at Cherokee Yacht Club. Saturday, April 2 – Wayne Smith’s 3rd Annual Big Shots Birthday Bash & Karaoke at Big Shots Rhythm & Booze. Friday, April 15 at 1:00 p.m. – official groundbreaking ceremonies for the new Shangri-La Resort Hotel. Saturday, April 23 – Old Bulldog Band at Big Shots on Monkey Island raising money for the Community Crisis Center.Saturday, April 23 – Grove Education Foundation For Excellence (GEFFE) Gala at the Grove Civic Center. Friday-Sunday, April 29-May 1 – “Dare to Compare” Lakewide In-Water Boat Show.

*****

It’s getting to the nitty gritty in the NCAA Basketball Tournament.  We’re down to 16 teams now with the West and South Regionalson Thursday, and the Midwest and East Regionals on Friday.  Elite Eight games will be played Saturday & Sunday to determine the Final Four.

The OKC Thunder have a pair of home games this weekend, hosting Utah Thursday night and San Antonio Saturday.  Both games are at 7:00 on FSOK. They’re back in action on the road with back-to-back games Monday night in Toronto and Tuesday night in Detroit. Those games are also televised on FSOK with tip-off at 6:30.

The PGA pros are scattered across the hemisphere this weekend with two great events.  Coverage of the Puerto Rico Open is on the Golf Channel 9:30 Thursday & Friday mornings and 8:00 a.m. Saturday & Sunday.  Most of the big names will be in Austin, Texas for the Dell Match Play. Coverage will begin at 1:00 Thursday and Friday and at 9:00 a.m. Saturday & Sunday on the Golf Channel. NBC picks up coverage of the final two days of play Saturday at 1:00 and Sunday at 2:00.

Horse racing’s richest day is Saturday with a total of $30 million in purse money over nine races at Meydan Racecourse in Nad Al Sheba, Dubai, capped by the $10 million Dubai World Cup race. NASCAR drivers are taking Easter weekend off.  They’ll be back on the track at Martinsville at noon, Sunday, April 3.

*****

The Easter weekend ahead looks really nice – sunshine and high temperatures approaching 70 degrees – and not much wind.  Maybe a little shower Sunday. Have a terrific weekend. Get out there and enjoy all Grand Lake has to offer.  Have fun, and remember, wherever you choose to party, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you.  It could be me. 

GRAND LAKE BUM

 

Want more information on advertisers you see in the Grand Lake Bum?  No problem.  Just click on their ad and you will be connected to their web site.  If you would like to join the growing list of sponsors of The Grand Lake Bum e-blast and the Bum’s page on both and www.360grandlake.com, the cost is only $50 a week and the list of readers is growing.  E-mail or contact 360grandlake.com to sign up.

 

Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area?  Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.

 

American Grill in Grove

Aquabar & Grill at The Landings Marina on Monkey Island (smoking on the deck)

Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley (smoking in the bar)

Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)

Big Shots on Monkey Island (smoking upstairs—open Friday & Saturday nights)

Bobbers Café north of Langley on Highway 82

Book ‘ems at South Wind Marina in Bernice

Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La on Monkey Island (smoking on the patios)

Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)

Carlos Montez in Langley (smoking in bar)

Ceasar’s Place in Vinita and on Monkey Island

Chicken Coop in Langley

Clanton’s Café in Vinita

Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina

Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)

Drake’s Restaurant in Grove

Frosty & Edna’s (west of the dam in Langley)

Gabby’s Place in downtown Grove

Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)

Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)

Grand Lodge in Ketchum (smoking)

High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)

Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)

Iron Frog (Grove)

Island Joe's Kentena at Shangri-La Marina (smoking)

J.R. Spanky's on Highway 10 north of Grove (smoking)

Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina

Karrie's Kaboose in Vinita (smoking)

La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove

Lakeside Bar & Grill in Grove at Sail Boat Bridge

Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum

Los Garcias in Langley

Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove

Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)

Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)

Morrows Landing in Raper Hollow

Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove

Okie Smokies Barbecue in Grove on Hwy 59 South

Book ‘ems Restaurant & Pub at South Wind Marina in Bernice

Pickles at the Lake in Langley

Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)

Raggedy’s in Grove

Rancho Viejo in Grove

Riggs & Company in Langley

Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)

Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)

Scooters in Langley (smoking)

Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)

Smokin’ Spur BBQ & Trading Post at Old Towne Plaza, Cleora

Sticky Fingers Barbecue in Ketchum

Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)

Summit Restaurant at Shangri-La on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice

The Landings Marina (smoking on the deck)

The Landings Market and Grill on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)

The Office on Monkey Island (smoking)

The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)

The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)

Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)

VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)

Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove

Waterway Café, Harbors View Marina (smoking on breakwater dining deck)

Wolf Creek Diner in Grove

Wyandotte Nation Casino at Twin Bridges (smoking)

Grand Lake Bum 4-24-16

Before the wind came sweeping down the plains just ahead of the rain on Sunday, last weekend was absolutely picture perfect on Grand Lake – and everybody took full advantage.  The lake looked like it was a Saturday in June last weekend.  I don’t think I have ever seen so many boats on the water and so many golfers on the courses in April as I saw last weekend!  Welcome to paradise! It reminded me once again of the signature line out of the official Monkey Island Anthem: “We watch folks come in here for the weekend, just wishing they could stay and be like us!”

*****

Grand Lake is already at the point in the season where you can’t possibly do everything.  Believe me, I try! I couldn’t make it to the GEFFE Gala Saturday night, but reports from the event are fabulous. It’s a good thing we have people who are willing to pony up and support our schools, because the state legislature certainly is NOT. We’re the point of shooting up from the bottom toward the middle again.  My pal Josh Davis is now marketing T-shirts and bumper stickers with our new state slogan: Make Oklahoma OK Again.

*****

Speaking of fun for worthy causes, I had another fabulous time Saturday night at Big Shots watching the absolutely fabulous Old Bulldog Band and raising money for the Community Crisis Center. What happened to bands that could play songs from the Beatles, the Zombies, Lovin’ Spoonful, Sam & Dave, the Animals, Los Bravos, and even the Monkees – all in one set?  Those guys & gals are fabulous! I might have had too much fun, especially by the time the Bulldog performance was over and I made it over to Monkey Island Pub for the big Hee Haw/Rockabilly party.  I sure was glad to see those guys from the Travelin’ Pig Barbecue still shoveling some buzz-killing food out the windows of their trailer! #lifesavers

*****

Eating while naked?  I don’t know if Grand Lake is ready for it, yet; and you would undoubtedly have a bit of a problem getting the Oklahoma legislature to legalize it, but it is an apparent hit in London. A 42-seat restaurant called Bunyadi will open in June featuring naked servers and patrons, alike. That’s a pretty good deal for guys who have spent years buying dinners for girls who may or may not ever take their clothes off.  Now, they’ll be able to know right up front – before dinner!  Not everybody is shy about it, apparently.  The restaurant has a waiting list of 11,000.  I don’t know if the kitchen staff is naked or not. If so, I hope they know not to try frying bacon. 

*****

The Oklahoma legislature, in its infinite wisdom, has approved a new law which would allow anyone over the age of 21 to open carry a gun, not permit, no training, no background check, no nothing.  What could possibly go wrong?  The only deal is, you can’t carry guns into the capitol building where the guys & gals are who passed the law.

*****

If your husband, wife, or partner suddenly has the urge to buy a new mattress…here’s your warning.  A Spanish company has invented a new mattress than can tell if your partner has been cheating on you. The “smarttress” uses 24 ultrasonic wave sensors to detect whether your mattress is being used while you’re gone – and by how many people (including where the most pressure is put on the mattress). When questionable activity is detected in your bed, the “Lover Detection System” sends an alert to your smart phone. If you or your lover either one feels the need to purchase this new $1,300 mattress…it sucks to be you.

*****

Election year seems to always bring out the “crazies” and their crazy ideas.  In Texas, enough of the Republican County Convention gatherings passed resolutions calling for a Texas secession from the United States that the topic will probably actually be up for discussion at the Texas Republican State Convention.  It works for me.  Oklahoma will willingly take Texas’ federal highway funding money, education grant money, military bases, and Medicaid dough.  Plus, the Big 12 will be a lot easier competition without Texas, Texas Tech, TCU, Baylor. Buh-bye.  In reality, it probably won’t be quite that easy.  Federal courts rules back in 1869 that states did not have the right to secede.  You may remember that it didn’t work out so well for them the last time a few of them decided to try it.

*****

BEST FACEBOOK POST THIS WEEK: If Trump wins the election, it will be the first time in American history that a billionaire has moved into public housing vacated by a black family.

*****

LEGAL TIP OF THE WEEK (from Josh Davis): “If you have an outstanding warrant for your arrest, it’s probably not a good idea to drive around town in your car that has your name stenciled in giant letters on the back window.”

*****

DINING AND DRINKING BY WATER UPDATE: Shrimpfest this Friday night at Island Joe’s – shrimp cocktail, fried shrimp, baked potato: $16. The Aqua Bar & Grill at The Landings Marina also opens for the season this weekend.

*****

GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy Birthday wishes go out this week John Lewis, Mike Burnett, Nina Landers, Julie Smith, Judi Barber, Bonnie Carpenter, Mike Foshee, Nancy Brandwein, Alice Ehrie, Robin Markwell, Dick Lane, Lori Stanphill, David Jones, Gregg Lorimor, Cale DeLozier, Josh Goff, and Michael Garner.

*****

UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK:  Why are pizzas round, packaged in square boxes, and eaten in triangles?

*****

BEST EVENT OF THE WEEK: The Dare to Compare In-Water Boat Show runs Friday-Sunday.  It includes seven Grand Lake dealers at five locations: Shangri-La Marina (Nichols Marine will be there also), MarineMax (Grand Lake Boat Sales will be there also), Ugly John’s Thunder Bay, Dick Lane’s of Grand Lake, and Williams Yacht Group.

*****

GRAND LAKE WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: There’s plenty of live entertainment around the lake this weekend. On Monkey Island, it’s another big weekend. Randy Lunsford entertains Thursday-Sunday evenings at The Shebang and there’s karaoke on the Balcony Bar Friday & Saturday nights. This week is also a great week at Shebang for live theater fans.  Miami Little Theater presents the Marvelous Wonderettes Friday night at 8:00.  Optional dinner seating is available with service from 6:00-8:00. Just down Highway 125, there’s always great entertainment at Monkey Island Pub and The Road Hog Saloon, as well.

If you’re in the Grove area, Randy Lunsford also entertains Tuesday and Wednesday evenings at Gabby’s in downtown Grove; and there’ll be great live music by popular Western Justice both Friday and Saturday nights at J.R. Spanky’s (Highway 10 Northeast of Grove).

If you’re in the South Grand Lake area, Saturday night is Karaoke Night at Juan Montez at Red Arrow Marina; and Billy K will perform live Saturday night at Pickles at the Lake, just north of Langley.

Area casinos have great options this weekend, as well. At Buffalo Run Casino’s Trailer Park Bar & Grill, Big Smitty will be on stage both Friday and Saturday nights. At the Downstream Casino’s Legends Sports Bar The Bobby D Band will perform Friday night followed by The American Kids Saturday night. Lover’s Leap Lounge will feature the softer sounds of Howard Gayles both Friday& Saturday nights. At Bordertown Casino’s Lost Creek Saloon, there are free line dancing lessons every Wednesday night and the Spring Sing It Contest every Thursday night. Brandon Butler will provide the musical entertainment Friday night at Bordertown, followed Thomas Martinez Saturday night.  At Indigo Sky Casino, there is live entertainment in the Echo Bar beginning withRachelle Turner with Georgia Coast Thursday night, followed by Leah & the Mojo Doctors Friday night and Rocked N LoadedSaturday. If comedy is your thing, it’s a great weekend at Loony Saloon at The Stables Casino. Distinguished Gentlemen will be on stage Friday & Saturday nights.

The best spots to catch PGA play, NBA Playoff games, and NASCAR action are the Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La, Island Joe’s at Shangri-La Marina, Monkey Island Pub, the Standing Room Only Bar at The Shebang, Road Hog Saloon, Pickles at the Lake in Langley, Hookers at Cherokee Yacht Club and J.R. Spanky’s northeast of Grove.

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BUM MUST-SEE TV: Ricky Gervais’ Special Correspondents is available on NetFlix beginning Friday. Saturday night at 7:00 theRock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremonies are on HBO at 7:00, and the American Country Countdown Awards areSunday night at 7:00 on Fox. Countdown Awards are Sunday night. Houdini & Doyle premieres Monday, May 2 at 9:00 on Fox.Tuesday, May 3, First Lady Michelle Obama will make a guest appearance on NCIS in conjunction with her “Joining Forces” initiative beginning at 7:00 on CBS. That same night is the Season 5 premiere of Person of Interest at 9:00, also on CBS.

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BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: Mother’s Day, Keanu and Ratchet & Clank

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QUOTE OF THE WEEK in response to Harriet Tubman replacing Andrew Jackson on the twenty dollar bill: “It’s truly exciting to have a woman on the twenty, although, unfortunately, due to the wage gap, it’s now gonna be worth $17.”  – Stephen Colbert

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SAVE THE DATE: Friday-Sunday, April 29-May 1 – “Dare to Compare” Lakewide In-Water Boat Show. Thursday, May 5-Sunday, May 8 – Cinco de Mayo Weekend Fiesta at Juan Montez Restaurant and Bar at Red Arrow Marina. Friday, May 6 – GRDA Lake Launch at the Ecosystems Center in Langley. Saturday, May 7 – Burning of the Socks at 4:00 p.m. at Harbors View Marina. Sunday, May 8 – Mother’s Day Sunday Buffet at the Summit Restaurant at Shangri-La. Saturday, May 14 – “Barkaritaville,” a fundraiser for Grand Lake’s Second Chance Pet Rescue, 5:00-9:30 at Honey Creek Landing & Marina in Grove.

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It’s a good sports weekend, especially for basketball and hockey fans. NBA Playoffs continue in Round 1 competition with game 6 (as needed) come Thursday & Friday with game 7 action on Saturday & Sunday, if necessary.  NBA games are on TNT, ABC, and ESPN.  NHL playoff action is on NBCSN, CNBC, and USA.

PGA Golfers are in the Crescent City this weekend for the Zurich Classic of New Orleans.  Coverage is on the Golf Channel at 2:00Thursday & Friday, and noon Saturday & Sunday.  CBS picks up the final two rounds at 2:00 Saturday & Sunday; and the NASCAR kids are in Talladega for the GEICO 500 at noon Sunday on Fox.

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It looks like the April showers are going to continue through the month, as predicted – at least off & on.  The weekend forecast calls for scattered showers from time to time, but nothing to worry about. High temperatures will be in the 70s.  It looks like the perfect weekend to buy a boat at the big lakewide boat show, then enjoy a little party to celebrate at your favorite night spot.  Remember, though, wherever you choose to party, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you.  It could be me. 

GRAND LAKE BUM

 

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Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area?  Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.

 

American Grill in Grove

Aquabar & Grill at The Landings Marina on Monkey Island (smoking on the deck)

Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley (smoking in the bar)

Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)

Big Shots on Monkey Island (smoking upstairs—open Friday & Saturday nights)

Bobbers Café north of Langley on Highway 82

Book ‘ems at South Wind Marina in Bernice

Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La on Monkey Island (smoking on the patios)

Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)

Carlos Montez in Langley (smoking in bar)

Ceasar’s Place in Vinita and on Monkey Island

Chicken Coop in Langley

Clanton’s Café in Vinita

Cosby’s Catfish on Highway 28 in Eucha (East of Disney)

Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina

Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)

Drake’s Restaurant in Grove

Frosty & Edna’s (west of the dam in Langley)

Gabby’s Place in downtown Grove

Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)

Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)

Grand Lodge in Ketchum (smoking)

High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)

Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)

Iron Frog (Grove)

Island Joe's Kentena at Shangri-La Marina (smoking)

J.R. Spanky's on Highway 10 north of Grove (smoking)

Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina

Karrie's Kaboose in Vinita (smoking)

La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove

Lakeside Bar & Grill in Grove at Sail Boat Bridge

Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum

Los Garcias in Langley

Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove

Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)

Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)

Morrows Landing in Raper Hollow

Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove

Okie Smokies Barbecue in Grove on Hwy 59 South

Book ‘ems Restaurant & Pub at South Wind Marina in Bernice

Pickles at the Lake in Langley

Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)

Raggedy’s in Grove

Rancho Viejo in Grove

Riggs & Company in Langley

Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)

Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)

Scooters in Langley (smoking)

Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)

Smokin’ Spur BBQ & Trading Post at Old Towne Plaza, Cleora

Sticky Fingers Barbecue in Ketchum

Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)

Summit Restaurant at Shangri-La on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice

The Landings Marina (smoking on the deck)

The Landings Market and Grill on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)

The Office on Monkey Island (smoking)

The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)

The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)

Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)

VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)

Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove

Waterway Café, Harbors View Marina (smoking on breakwater dining deck)

Wolf Creek Diner in Grove

Wyandotte Nation Casino at Twin Bridges (smoking)

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