June is here, already. I can’t believe it. It seems like Welcome Back Weekend was just a couple of weeks ago – and now the fourth of July is just a month away. Weird. The weather has been so strange, we’re going to have to double up on the fun just to catch up with the calendar!
Hopefully, some of my readers can help out my pal, Don, who wrote me over the weekend with a pretty serious problem. “Bum, I really need your advice on a serious problem,” he wrote. “I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. You know, just the usual signs: The phone rings and when I answer, the caller hangs up. Plus, she goes out with ‘the girls’ a lot. I usually try to stay awake to look out for her when she comes home, but I always fall asleep.
Anyway, last night about midnight, I woke up and she was not home. So, hid in the garage, behind my boat and waited for her. When she came home, she got out of someone’s car, buttoning her blouse, then she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on.
It was at that moment, while crouched behind the boat, that I noticed a hairline crack in the outboard motor mounting bracket. Is that something I can weld, or do I need to replace the whole bracket?” Hopefully some of my wise friends can help ol’ Don out.
Even if you’re going to resort to a life of crime, you need a little bit of intelligence. That was apparently NOT the case for Everardo Deleon-Diaz in San Diego last week, when he finally managed to break into a car to steal it, only to be busted by the owner who was sleeping in the back seat. The owner awakened quickly, and Deleon-Diaz “went to sleep” equally fast.
BEST FACEBOOK POST OF THE WEEK was the photograph of a technician applying duct tape to the engine of an EasyJet passenger plane in Europe just before take-off. My friends at Fark suggested an announcement by the Captain would have been appropriate: “This is your captain speaking. If you will just look out the windows on the left side of the plane, you won’t notice the ground crew applying adhesive tape to the engine casing on the right side.”
Who was it that encouraged Secretary of State John Kerry prior to his departure for Europe to work on nuclear arms negotiations relating to Iran? You have to be careful with the Secretary of State. Advising him to “break a leg” in his venture, turned out to be advice that he took a little too literally. He did it in a bicycling accident in Switzerland, and had to cut his trip short, heading to Boston for treatment.
If you need a football fix, Johnny Manziel is in the news again. Apparently a fan got a little irritated when Manziel refused to sign an autograph at the Four Seasons Hotel in Irving, Texas during the AT&T Byron Nelson golf tournament over the weekend. Manziel, with the calm, cool restraint he is becoming known for, threw a water bottle at the kid. According to the cops, the Browns quarterback wasn’t drinking. Apparently he doesn’t have much class when he’s sober, either. No arrests. No police report. Nothing to see here, folks. Move on.
Cuba has made another big switch. Last week, they were taken off the United States official “Terrorist Country” blacklist which they were listed on beginning in 1982. Somebody finally came to their senses in Washington. I’m pretty excited about the new relations with Cuba. I think that’s a pretty positive change, moving from the “terrorism list” to the “tourism list.”
GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy Birthday wishes go out this week to Andrew Doney, Chris Mullen, Tiana Douglas, Julie McFerron, Gerald Barry, Curtis Jurgensmeyer, Dan Arnold, Sam Hoskin, and Troy Smith. Special congratulations to “The First Lady of Country Fiddle,” Grand Lake’s own Jana Jae. Now, on top of her induction into the Oklahoma Music Hall of Fame, she has also been inducted into the National Fiddler Hall of Fame!
UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK: What if the hokey pokey really is what it’s all about?
BEST EVENTS OF THE WEEK: Saturday is the Annual Home of Hope Admirals Banquet at Cherokee Yacht Club (5:00). If you’re a Shangri-La Golf Club member, Saturday night is also the Members Appreciation Party at Shangri-La Golf Club (7:00) including a “Golf Cart Drive-In Movie” showing of “The Sandlot” on the practice tees at dark. Sunday is the “Puck the Pelican Golf Tournament” at Patricia Island Golf Club benefiting The Playmakers in Grove.
GRAND LAKE WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: As always, there are great live entertainment options around the lake. On Monkey Island, there’s always dancing music at the Road Hog Saloon, Monkey Island Pub, Island Joe’s Kentena and Big Shots Rhythm & Booze. T-Bird entertains at Island Joe’s Friday night, with Jim Green taking the stage Saturday night. Sundayafternoon features Denny Blackburn wrapping up the weekend entertainment at Island Joe’s. Randy Lunsford entertains Friday &Saturday evenings at The Shebang – plus, there’s karaoke on the Balcony Bar at The Shebang Friday and Saturday.
On South Grand Lake, there’s always great music at Pickles at the Lake, as well as Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina. If you’re headed even further south – to Spavinaw – there will be an entire afternoon and evening of music at the big Copperhead Run eventSaturday, topped off with the popular Lickitty Split.
If you’re in the Grove area, there are always great bands on Friday & Saturday nights at J.R. Spanky’s (Highway 10 Northeast of Grove).
Area casinos have great entertainment choices this weekend. At Buffalo Run Casino’s Trailer Park Bar & Grill, Dirty Saints will perform both Friday and Saturday nights. At Downstream Casino, there’s a great flashback for you Saturday night, with a concert by Tommy James and the Shondells in The Pavilion. Also at Downstream, “America’s Got Talent” star Milton Patton will be on stage night in Legends Sports Bar, followed by Mr. Lucky on Saturday night. Kenny Babb will entertain with his solo piano performance in the Lover’s Leap Lounge both Friday and Saturday nights. At Indigo Sky Casino, there is live entertainment in the Echo Bar beginning with Solid Gold Thursday night. Big Smitty takes the stage on Friday night, with Diversity performing Saturdaynight!
If comedy is your thing, Todd Justice will be on stage both Friday and Saturday nights at the Loony Saloon Comedy Club at The Stables Casino with special guest Billy McFarland.
The best spots to catch NBA playoffs, along with PGA, Stanley Cup and NASCAR action are the Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La, Monkey Island Pub, the Standing Room Only Bar at The Shebang, Island Joe’s Kentena at Shangri-La Marina, Road Hog Saloon, Hookers at Cherokee Yacht Club, Pickles at the Lake in Langley and J.R. Spanky’s northeast of Grove. Enjoy!
BUM MUST-SEE TV: Hannibal Thursday at 9:00 on NBC, Living Grand on Grand Lake Friday at 6:30 on RSU-TV, and The 69th Annual Tony Awards Sunday at 7:00 on CBS.
BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: Entourage, Insidious: Chapter 3 and I’ll See You in my Dreams
QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “It’s been raining in Texas because God has been crying since Blue Bell closed.” –www.iamatexan.com
SAVE THE DATE: Thursday-Saturday, June 11-13 – American Heritage Music Festival in Grove. Saturday, June 13 – World’s Largest Calf Fry & Cook-Off at the America Legion Rodeo Grounds in Vinita. Saturday, June 13 – Annual Gala Under the Starts at Hangar #21, South Grand Lake Regional Airport, at 6:30 (reservations required) sponsored by Girlfriends of the Airport.Saturday, June 20 – Pontoon Rally in Splash Bash Alley (Ketchum Cove). Saturday-Sunday, June 20-21 – Thunder at Wolf Creek Boat Races. Sunday, June 21 – Happy Father’s Day! Friday, June 26 – Grove Area Chamber of Commerce Golf Tournament at Patricia Island Golf Club. Friday, June 26 – Duck Creek Fireworks Spark Plug Dinner at Arrowhead Yacht Club.
We’re down to one horse race in the Triple Crown series, and two teams in both the NBA Championship race and the NHL Stanley Cup playoffs. NBA Championship playoffs start Thursday night (8:00) with Cleveland at Golden State. Sunday night is game 2 (7:00) at Golden State. Game 3 is Tuesday night in Cleveland (8:00). NBA Coverage is all on ABC now. The Stanley Cup finals kick off Wednesday night, with games 2-4 scheduled on Saturday, Monday and Wednesday evenings at 7:00 (6:15 on Saturday). Tampa Bay and Chicago are the last two teams standing. All Stanley Cup games are on NBC.
On the PGA Tour, it’s time for The Memorial. Coverage is on the Golf Channel beginning at 1:30 Thursday & Friday, and at 11:30Saturday and 11:00 Sunday. CBS has coverage of the final two rounds beginning 2:00 Saturday & 1:30 Sunday.
It’s time for the final leg of horse racing’s Triple Crown Series. Coverage of The Belmont Stakes begins Saturday at 4:00 on NBC. Actual post time for the Belmont is 5:30.
On the NASCAR circuit, it’s the Axalta “We Paint Winners 400” from Pocono this week. Sprint Cup coverage begins at noonSunday on Fox Sports 1.
For the first time since I can remember, there aren’t any little lightning bolts on the weather app on my phone. There’s actually a little sunshine icon. I almost forgot what that looks like. The weather forecast is fabulous, with a weekend forecast of sunshine, light winds and high temperatures pushing 90 degrees. It’s about time! Plus… the lake level is actually dropping. There’s plenty happening this weekend, so get out and have fun, but watch for debris on the water. And remember - wherever you choose to party around the lake, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you. It could be me.
GRAND LAKE BUM
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Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area? Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.
American Grill in Grove
Aquabar & Grill at The Landings Marina on Monkey Island (smoking on the deck)
Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley (smoking in the bar)
Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)
Big Shots on Monkey Island (smoking upstairs—open Friday & Saturday nights)
Book ‘ems at South Wind Marina in Bernice
Buffalo Bar at Shangri-La on Monkey Island (smoking on the patios)
Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)
Carlos Montez in Langley (smoking in bar)
Ceasar’s Place in Vinita and on Monkey Island
Chicken Coop in Langley
Clanton’s Café in Vinita
Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina
Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)
Drake’s Restaurant in Grove
Frosty & Edna’s (west of the dam in Langley)
Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)
Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)
Grand Lodge in Ketchum (smoking)
High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)
Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)
Iron Frog (Grove)
Island Joe's Kentena at Shangri-La Marina (smoking)
J.R. Spanky's on Highway 10 north of Grove (smoking)
Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina
Karrie's Kaboose in Vinita (smoking)
La Casita de Martin in Grove
Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum
Los Garcias in Langley
Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove
Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)
Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)
Morrows Landing in Raper Hollow
Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove
Okie Smokies Barbecue in Grove on Hwy 59 South
Book ‘ems Restaurant & Pub at South Wind Marina in Bernice
Pickles at the Lake in Langley
Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)
Rancho Viejo in Grove
Riggs & Company in Langley
Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)
Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)
Scooters in Langley (smoking)
Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)
Smokin’ Spur BBQ & Trading Post at Old Towne Plaza, Cleora
Sticky Fingers Barbecue in Ketchum
Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)
Summit Restaurant at Shangri-La on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)
The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice
The Landings Marina (smoking on the deck)
The Landings Market and Grill on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)
The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)
The Office on Monkey Island (smoking)
The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)
The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)
Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)
VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)
Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove
Waterway Café, Harbors View Marina (smoking on breakwater dining deck)
Wyandotte Nation Casino at Twin Bridges (smoking)