The Grand Lake Bum 6-11-17
Sunday is Father’s Day, and I want to save you some grief. Your Dad does not want a tie. He does not want cologne; and most of all, he does not want to work his butt buying steaks to grill for his extended family. I have a better suggestion. Clean his boat. Fill it with fuel. Load an ice chest with his favorite beverage(s). Take him to the boat, put him aboard, make sure it runs, remove the dock lines, then stand on the dock and wave goodbye. I know enough Dads to know that peace and quiet with adult beverages aboard a boat with no distractions is always a welcome gift. If your Dad doesn’t have a boat, several of my boat sales pals are standing by to help you make Father’s Day REALLY special. Be safe. Have fun.
If your anniversary is coming up, you probably can’t top the gift a Missouri woman gave her husband. Linda Fisher gave her husband John a nice Happy Anniversary card with 10 Missouri Lottery Bingo scratch-off tickets inside. Instead of just a nice meal, John says he might also take his wife on a camping trip. One of the scratch-off lottery cards was a $55,000 winner!
I knew someday my dream would come true…and now it’s on the horizon. All the fat guys who give me trouble about smoking may be worse off than I am! A new study by the American Cancer Society says obesity and inactivity may soon surpass smoking as a cause of cancer. The study says 13 kinds of cancer are linked to obesity. If that’s not enough, the study also says carrying all that excess weight around all your life could lead to mental disorders. So, there! Just keep eating! You’ll be fat, diseased, and maybe a little crazy. I may also end up diseased and crazy, but not as quickly. And I won’t be fat! Well, unless you count that caloric intake from bottles of brown liquid.
If that stresses you out, I have an idea that might help you reverse the effects of stress in your life. Have you noticed that “stressed” spelled backwards is “desserts”? Might be worth a try.
School is out in New York, and First Lady Melania Trump and son Barron are preparing to start slumming it at the White House. The East Wing of the White House has operated pretty much with the First Lady pretty much in absentia, remaining in Trump Tower luxury while their son finished the school year. Now…it’s off to the White House, possibly as soon as this week.
We’re #1. We’re #1. Oklahoma ranks #1 in reduced funding for education since the 2008 recession. Education funding has been cut by 26.9% since that time. The next closest is Alabama with a 14.2% cut. This is getting downright embarrassing.
We’ve all heard the bizarre and outrageous stories about school officials overreacting to anti-violence rules by suspended kids who point their fingers at others with their hand simulating the shape of a gun. But maybe there’s more to the power of finger-guns than we thought. In Auckland, New Zealand last month, a cop actually faked a suspect to the ground and arrested him, even though the cop had no weapon. He confidently pulled his finger and was apparently convincing enough the suspect hit the ground. If he gives up law enforcement, he might have a career in convincing improvisational acting!
How to win the corporate game – step up your own game. Abu Musa was a 7-Eleven franchise owner in Boston for many years before getting into an unwinnable war with headquarters over the chain’s hot food items which Musa describes as “gross.” Finally, he settled an expensive legal battle with 7-Eleven and was removed from his own store. Now, Musa has decided to one-up the chain. He opened a new store right across the street from his old 7-Eleven. He sells everything 7-Eleven sells – except hot food – and his prices are cheaper. His new anti-7-Eleven store is appropriately named….6-Twelve.
GRAND LAKE DINING & DRINKING UPDATE: Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La’s Resort Hotel is now open. Grand Lake now has its first restaurant/bar open from 7:00 a.m. until midnight seven days a week, 52 weeks a year – and it’s accessible by water, too! If you haven’t seen the new resort hotel and the amenities now offered at Grand Lake…OMG!! Go look!
BEST SIGN SEEN THIS WEEK (seen in front of a Mexican restaurant): Taco Emergency: Dial 9 Juan Juan
BEST FACEBOOK POST THIS WEEK: 1) Going to bed early. 2) Not leaving my house. 3) Not going to a party. My childhood punishments have become my adult goals.
TWEET OF THE WEEK: My favorite tweet this week, following a repeat as national champions, had to do with a proposed transfer of softball coach Patty Gasso to the football program: “Gasso for new Defensive Coordinator.”
COOKING TIP OF THE WEEK: If you stir coconut oil into your kale, it makes it easier to scrape into the trash.
GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy Birthday wishes go out this week to Michael Junk, John Link, Jessica Franczyk, Kevin Dennis, Thomas Straigis, Josh Russell, Mike Ward, Lisa Wright, and Brittani Isaac.
UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK: What do you call a male ladybug?
BEST EVENTS OF THE WEEK: Friday evening is the annual Grove Rotary Club Lobsterfest, Grove Civic Center at5:30. Saturday afternoon is the first Splash Bash of the summer in Ketchum Cove from noon-6:00. Tuesday, June 20 District Attorney Kenny Wright will speak at the Men Against Violence luncheon at noon at 1st Methodist Church in Grove.
GRAND LAKE WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: There’s great entertainment around the lake this weekend. On Monkey Island, you provide your own entertainment with Friday & Saturday night karaoke in the Balcony Bar upstairs at The Shebang on Monkey Island. Downstairs in the Burlesque Room, Randy Lunsford provides the entertainment. Across the street at Big Shots Rhythm & Booze, enjoy all the best dance tunes Friday and Saturday night, as well. Just down the highway from there, Friday night is Karaoke Night at Monkey Island Pub; and Saturday night is the big “Woodstock Costume Party” at The Pub. A little further down the road, there’s always great live weekend entertainment at the Road Hog Saloon.
On South Grand Lake, Risky Business will be on stage Friday night at Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina. Saturdayafternoon, Brett & Terri will entertain at the Splash Bash raft-up in Ketchum Cove, followed by RPM Saturday night at Sharky’s.
Area casinos have excellent musical options this weekend, as well, except for Downstream Casino where Legends Sports Bar will be closed for remodeling this week. Lickitty Split will play at Grand Lake Casino Saturday night. There are plenty of other choices, though, highlighted by The Righteous Brothers Thursday night at Buffalo Run Casino’s Showplace. Buffalo Run’s Trailer Park Bar & Grill will host Solace Friday night and DMS Saturday. Cherokee Casino Grove will feature KC Eliminator (with a ZZ Top tribute) and The Band DeLorean Friday night. I’m not sure aboutSaturday night, because both Cherokee Grove and Grand Lake Casino show Lickitty Split performing Saturday night. Hmmm. Sounds like a bidding war is upcoming. At River Bend Casino (formerly Wyandotte Casino), Club 60 West hostsEarl & Them Friday night. Saturday night is an unusual show at River Bend, to say the least. Extreme Midget Wrestlingkicks off at 7:00 Saturday night in the Club 60 West Event Center. At Indigo Sky Casino, there is live entertainment in the Echo Bar starting Thursday night with music by Low Flying Goats. Friday night features the music of Libby Starks & Bandit, followed by The Rumor Saturday night.
The best spots to catch all your favorite sports action, including NASCAR and PGA Golf are Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina, Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort Hotel, Monkey Island Pub, the Standing Room Only Bar at The Shebang, Road Hog Saloon, 1909 in Grove, and Pickles at the Lake in Langley.
BUM MUST-SEE TV: The AFI Life Achievement Award: A Tribute to Diane Keaton is Thursday night at 9:00 on TNT. Season 4 of Turn: Washington’s Spies premieres Friday night at 8:00 on AMC.
BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: Rough Night and Cars 3
QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “Despite (former FBI Director James) Comey’s testimony, a White House staffer said ‘Today is a regular Thursday at the White House.’ America was like, 'Yeah, that's what worries us.’” – Jimmy Fallon
By the way, don’t worry. The newly named FBI Director, Christopher Wray, is not the same Christopher Wray who works at the Summit Restaurant at Shangri-La. Same spelling…but not the same guy.
SAVE THE DATE: Friday, June 23 – formal dedication of Shangri-La’s new Resort Hotel (4:00 p.m.). Saturday &Sunday, June 24-25 – Men’s Golf Association Member/Guest Invitational at Shangri-La Golf Club. Saturday, June 24 – Free Boating Safety Course at GRDA Ecosystems Center in Langley (8-5). Friday, June 31 – Vinita Fireworks. Saturday, July 1 – Disney Fireworks. Sunday, July 2 – Monkey Island Fireworks. Monday, July 3 – Duck Creek Fireworks, Grove Fireworks (Wolf Creek) and Miami Fireworks (Riverview Park). Tuesday, July 4 – Jay Fireworks (J.B. Earp Stadium).Monday-Thursday, July 10-13 – Kids Sports Camp at Shangri-La (Members’ children only). Saturday, August 19 – Barkarita (fundraising party for Second Chance Pet Rescue) at Honey Creek Landing in Grove.
It’s a huge week on the PGA Tour. This week is the U.S. Open which will enjoy 45 hours of coverage from the networks of Fox. Coverage begins at 10:00 a.m. Thursday & Friday on FS1, and at 10:00 Saturday & Sunday mornings on Fox.
NASCAR drivers are Michigan this weekend for the Firekeepers Casino 400. Coverage starts at 2:00 Sunday on FS1.
The weather for the upcoming weekend looks like June usually looks. We may have a few scattered showers for a little while Friday, and some late afternoon stuff Saturday. Other than that, highs around 90. Sunday looks absolutely perfect for Father’s Day – sunshine, light winds and a high of 91. Get out and enjoy all Grand Lake has to offer, but remember, wherever you decide to play, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you. It could be me.
GRAND LAKE BUM
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Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area? Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.
1909 in Downtown Grove
American Grill in Grove
Aquabar & Grill at The Landings Marina on Monkey Island (smoking on the deck)
Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley
Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)
Big Shots on Monkey Island (smoking upstairs—open Friday & Saturday nights)
Blind Swine on Monkey Island
Bobbers Café in Langley
Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)
Café Italia on Monkey Island
Carlos Montez in Langley (smoking in bar)
Ceasar’s Place in Vinita and on Monkey Island
Chickanella’s in Grove
Chicken Coop West of Langley
Clanton’s Café in Vinita
Coffee Shelter in Ketchum
Cosby’s Catfish on Highway 28 in Eucha (East of Disney)
Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort Hotel
Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina
Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)
Drake’s on the Lake at Blue Bluff Harbor
Drake’s Restaurant in Grove
Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina
Frosty & Edna’s (west of the dam in Langley)
Gabby’s Place in downtown Grove
Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)
Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)
Grand Lodge in Ketchum (smoking)
Hatfield’s Saloon in Grove
High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)
Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)
Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina
Karrie's Kaboose in Langley (smoking)
La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove
Lakeside Bar & Grill in Grove at Sail Boat Bridge
Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum
Los Garcias in Langley
Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove
Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)
Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)
Morrows Bar & Grill in Raper Hollow
Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove
Okie Smokies Barbecue in Grove on Hwy 59 South
Pickles at the Lake in Langley
Pit Stop Café in Grove
Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)
Raggedy’s in Grove
Rancho Viejo in Grove
Riggs & Company in Langley
River Bend Casino in Wyandotte (smoking)
Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)
Roadhouse 125 on Monkey Island (smoking deck)
Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)
Scooters in Langley (smoking)
Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)
Smokin’ Spur BBQ & Trading Post at Old Towne Plaza, Cleora
Sticky Fingers Barbecue in Ketchum
Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)
The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice
The Landings Marina (smoking on the deck)
The Landings Market and Grill on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)
The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)
The Office on Monkey Island (smoking)
The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)
The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)
Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)
VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)
Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove
Waterway Café, Harbors View Marina (smoking on breakwater dining deck)
Wolf Creek Diner in Grove