April 16 Random Observations from The Grand Lake Bum

People who only gauge life by the weather might have thought last weekend wasn’t a big weekend at Grand Lake, but it certainly was! The only impact weather has on Grand Lakers is mode of transportation and choice of attire. The attitude and party spirit never changes. I had a terrific time at the South Grand Chamber’s Bootlegger’s Ball at Cherokee Yacht Club Saturday night, before switching ends of the lake. Admittedly, I looked a little out of place at Monkey Island Pub’s 50s Costume Party wearing my Bootlegger’s Ball attire. I just assured everybody I was dressed like the uncool kids in the 50s. Drinks were just as good, no matter the costume choice.

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Sunday afternoon/evening was another great time with lots of great friends who gathered at The Shebang to honor one of our own – Monkey Islander Dr. Duane Koehler who was recently installed as National President of the American College of Osteopathic Family Physicians. Pretty awesome. Another famous Grand Laker!!

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A record 794 candidates filed for public office last week. After filings from candidates running to replace Mary Fallin as governor, I’m surprised there were enough people left in the state to file for all the other offices – especially Republicans. Ten Republicans filed as candidates for Governor, along with two Democrats and three Libertarians. That should be enough candidates to keep everyone thoroughly confused.

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Attitudes evolve, I guess. Former U.S. House Speaker John Boehner said for years he was “unalterably opposed” to legalizing marijuana. Last week, he joined the Advisory Board of Acreage Holdings, one of the largest marijuana companies in the nation, operating in eleven states. He said “my thinking on Cannabis has evolved.” Well, that and….you know…a big stack of money. Boehner has also accepted a spot on the Board of tobacco giant Reynolds American.

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The Louisiana State Senate has approved a bill banning sex with animals. The vote was 25-10. Kinda makes you wonder about the hobbies of the 10 who voted against the ban.

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In Buffalo, Minnesota, there is a new definition for the phrase “Epic Fail” courtesy of 17-year-old aspiring driver. She failed her driver’s license exam when she put her car in “drive” instead of “reverse” as she began the test. When she hit the accelerator, the vehicle jumped the curb and crashed through the front of the driver’s license exam office. She was not hurt, but the examiner was hospitalized. #hownottodoit

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In Suffolk County, New York, Lizabeth Ildefonso reportedly had “dilated and glassy eyes and a white powdery substance in her left nostril” when she pulled into a drive-through  and ordered a “bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich.” Unfortunately for her, she was not at an actual fast-food restaurant. It was a security booth at the Suffolk County Jail. Charges include felony driving while impaired by drugs and driving without a valid license. I couldn’t find out whether or not she got the sandwich.

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My friends at Fark report that a news story about a Florida woman who allowed a two-year-old to smoke meth and roll marijuana joints must be totally fake news because “no one has ever learned to roll a good joint in less than two years.”

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BEST EXCUSE OF THE WEEK: Kennecia Posey was questioned by police in Fort Pierce, Florida, when they found a stash of cocaine in her purse. “I don’t know anything about any cocaine,” she told officers. “It’s a windy day. It must have flown through the window and into my purse.” Hmmm. Might come up with something better before the trial, I’m thinking.

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BEST FACEBOOK POST THIS WEEK (computer screen): Now installing Spring. Loading, please wait….Installation failed. Spring not found! Spring is not available in your area.

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BEST SIGN SEEN THIS WEEK: I wonder if O.J. will stay single or take another stab at marriage.

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TWEET OF THE WEEK: You know you’re getting old when you go to bed at the time you used to go out.

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RANDY KREHBIEL’S RANDOM FACTOID OF THE WEEK: The late George Carlin received a general discharge from the Air Force in 1957 after being court-martialed three times and listed as "unproductive" by his superiors.

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FEEL-OLD MOMENT OF THE WEEK: The Sound of Music starring Julie Andrews and Christopher Plummer was released fifty-three years ago.

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BEST (FAKE NEWS) HEADLINE OF THE WEEK: Video Surfaces of Trump Cutting the Tags Off the End of His Mattress

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BEST OBSERVATION OF THE WEEK: Porn star Stormy Daniels is now cooperating with federal authorities in the investigation of Michael Cohen, President Trump’s attorney who says he paid her $130,000 for her silence about an affair with the President. We’ll call this saga “Operation Desert Stormy.”

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GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy birthday wishes go out this week to Jackie Moore, Greg Bolton, Boyd Ayer, Don Douglas, Gaines Dittrich, Jim Forrester, Leah Lewandowski, Ron Stahl, Judy Dullea, and Phil Carrott.

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UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK: If you can’t drink and drive, why do all the bars have parking lots?

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BEST EVENT OF THE WEEK: Ales & Tails event at the rodeo grounds in Vinita Saturday night. Four fabulous bands – and great food! Event starts at 6:00. Gates open at 5:00.

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GRAND LAKE WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: There’s plenty of great entertainment around the lake this weekend. On Monkey Island, dance the night away every Saturday night at Big Shots Rhythm & Booze. Just down highway 125, Friday night is karaoke night at Monkey Island Pub; and a little further down the highway, Blind Swine offers both karaoke and live music. At Littlefield Corner, the Road Hog Saloon has live music every Saturday night.

On South Grand Lake, Friday night is Karaoke Night at Michelle’s Bar & Grill at Grand Lodge in Ketchum – and there’s always live entertainment at Michelle’s on Saturday night.

In Vinita Saturday night, there will be fabulous Red Dirt music at the Ales & Tails event at the rodeo grounds. Whiskey Poet Society, Stoney LaRue, Cameran Nelson, and Read Southall are all on the bill beginning at 6:00. Area casinos have big entertainment plans, too. Cherokee Casino Grove features music by RocKFiscH Fridaynight and nighTTrain Saturday night. At Bordertown Casino’s Lost Creek Saloon, you are the star at Thursday night karaoke. Bobby D will be on stage at BordertownFriday night; and Derryl Perry entertains Saturday. Grand Lake Casino’s Venue 655 features Blank Earth Friday night. At River Bend Casino’s Club 60 West Bar,Lucas Gates will perform Friday night, followed by Paralandra Saturday. A few feet away, there will be another great show in the Club 60 West Event Center Saturdaynight – Blaze of Glory: The Bon Jovi Experience. Indigo Sky Casino offers three nights of musical entertainment this week. Chris Hyde performs both Thursday andFriday nights in the Echo Bar. Saturday night, music will be provided by Free Fallin.

The best spots to catch all your favorite sports action, including NBA Playoffs, PGA Golf, and NASCAR are Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort Hotel, the Standing Room Only Bar at The Shebang, Monkey Island Pub, Blind Swine, Road Hog Saloon, 1909 in Grove, and Pickles at the Lake in Langley.

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BUM MUST-SEE TV: Kodachrome and Mercury 13 will both be available Friday on NETFLIX. Monday night at 9:00 on CBS is the prime time special The Late Late Show Carpool Karaoke; and the season 3 premiere of Code Black airs next Wednesday night at 9:00, also on CBS.

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BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: I Feel Pretty, Super Troopers 2, Dolphins, and Duck Duck Goose

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QUOTE OF THE WEEK: ”You know what the most dangerous neighborhood in the country is right now? The comments section on every webpage and on Facebook. No sane person would ever say the kind of things that they write online to someone face-to-face. If you did, you’d get killed.” – Jimmy Kimmel

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SAVE THE DATE: Thursday-Sunday, April 26-29 – Bassmaster Elite Tournament out of Wolf Creek. Saturday, April 28 – Burning of the Socks at Harbors View Marina. Saturday, April 28 – Old Bulldog Band at Big Shots Rhythm & Booze. Thursday, May 3 – Vinita Area Chamber of Commerce Classic Golf Tournament at The Coves. Friday-Sunday, May 4-6 – In-Water Boat Show at Shangri-La Marina.

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First round NBA Playoff games continue this weekend. Following Wednesday night’s game in OKC, the Thunder are off to the west coast, facing Portland on the road for Game 3 Saturday night (9:00 on ESPN) and Game 4 Monday night (9:30 on TNT). Game 5 is scheduled for next Wednesday night. The rest of the playoff games run Saturday (four games beginning at 1:30), Sunday (four games beginning at noon), with two more games Monday night and as many as four games next Tuesday and Wednesday nights, depending on whether or not any of the teams sweep a four-game-straight round 1 win streak.

PGA players are deep in the heart of Texas this week for the Valero Texas Open in San Antonio. Coverage is on the Golf Channel at 2:30 Thursday & Friday, noon Saturday & Sunday. CBS picks up the final two rounds at 2:00 Saturday & Sunday.

NASCAR drivers are in Richmond this weekend for some late racing on Saturday. Coverage of the Toyota Owners 400 begins at 5:30 Saturday afternoon on Fox.

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Maybe Spring is FINALLY arriving. We may have a shower or two Saturday, but at least high temperatures are forecast to start with a “6” all weekend. That’s more like it! There are a lot of activities and plenty of entertainment around the lake this weekend. Get some of it! But…wherever you decide to party, be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you. It could be me.

GRAND LAKE BUM

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Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area?  Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.

1909 in Downtown Grove

American Grill in Grove

Aquabar & Grill at The Landings Marina on Monkey Island (smoking on the deck)

Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley

Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)

Big Shots on Monkey Island (smoking upstairs—open Friday & Saturday nights)

Blind Swine on Monkey Island

Blue Bluff Café at Blue Bluff Harbor

Bobbers Café in Langley

Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)

Café Italia on Monkey Island

Café Yum in Grove

Carlos Montez in Langley (smoking in bar)

Ceasar’s Place in Vinita and at Littlefield Corner

Checkered Past in Grove

Chickanella’s in Grove

Chicken Coop West of Langley

Clanton’s Café in Vinita

Coffee Shelter in Ketchum

Cosby’s Catfish on Highway 28 in Eucha (East of Disney)

Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort Hotel

Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina

Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)

Drake’s on the Lake at Blue Bluff Harbor

Drake’s Restaurant in Grove

Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina

Frosty & Edna’s (west of the dam in Langley)

Gabby’s Place in downtown Grove

Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)

Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)

Grand Lodge in Ketchum (smoking)

Hatfield’s Saloon in Grove

High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)

Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)

Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina

Karrie's Kaboose in Langley (smoking)

La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove

Lakeside Bar & Grill in Grove at Sail Boat Bridge

Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum

Los Garcias in Langley

Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove

Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)

Monkey’s Uncle at Littlefield Corner (Breakfast & lunch)

Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)

Morrows Bar & Grill in Raper Hollow

Mulligan’s at Patricia Island Golf Club in Grove

Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove

Okie Smokies Barbecue in Grove on Hwy 59 South

Pickles at the Lake in Langley

Pit Stop Café in Grove

Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)

Raggedy’s in Grove

Rancho Viejo in Grove

Riggs & Company in Langley

River Bend Casino in Wyandotte (smoking)

Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)

Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)

Scooters in Langley (smoking)

Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)

Smokin’ Spur BBQ & Trading Post at Old Towne Plaza, Cleora

Sticky Fingers Barbecue in Ketchum

Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)

The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice

The Landings Marina (smoking on the deck)

The Landings Market and Grill on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)

The Office on Monkey Island (smoking)

The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)

The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)

Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)

VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)

Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove

Waterway Café, Harbors View Marina (smoking on breakwater dining deck)

Wolf Creek Diner in Grove