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July 1 Random Observations of The Grand Lake Bum

We finally made it to the Fourth of July week – and things are looking pretty darn good on Grand Lake. I’m sure glad. If I have one more person ask me when the lake is going to be at 744’ or whether there is debris in the lake or whether it’s safe to swim in the lake, I’m tempted to shoot them right between the eyes! To avoid that scenario, here are the answers to those three questions: 1) I don’t know, GRDA doesn’t know, the Corps of Engineers doesn’t know – only Mother Nature knows; 2) watch the water in front of you – it’s in pretty good shape, but watching where you go is always a pretty good idea; and 3) it’s a LAKE, for heaven’s sake. If you don’t want to swim in a lake, don’t do it. Oh, one more thing. I’m also sick of seeing information about boating conditions on Grand Lake posted on social media sites by people who have not been out in a boat!

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The bottom line is this: the lake is open, and there’s a lot to do. A LOT! Boat, swim, golf, dance, sing, listen to bands, parasail, watch fireworks every night, enjoy the sun, eat, drink, and get married – oops, I mean “be merry.”

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I thought nothing was stranger than my being required to show an I.D. to buy cigarettes at Dollar General, but my story has been topped. When you are obviously old enough to buy a beer – and everyone in the entire country knows your face, it’s something different entirely. At the Stagecoach Festival last week, vendors refused to sell a guy a beer because he didn’t have an I.D. “Well, in the first place, I am who you think I am…and in the second place, I’m 62 gxddzm years old!” – said superstar Tom Hanks.

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By the way, did you now that “Dammit, I’m mad” spelled backwards is still “Dammit, I’m mad?”

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MISUNDERSTANDING OF THE WEEK: A man received the following text from his neighbor: “I am so sorry, Bob. I am riddled with guilt and I have to confess. I have been helping myself to your wife, day and night, when you’re not around. In fact, more than you do. I do not get it at home, but that’s no excuse. I can no longer live with the guilt and I hope you will accept my sincerest apology along with my promise that it won’t ever happen again.” Bob stood stunned, unable to even think what to do. Then, he received a second text: “Damn auto-correct. I mean wi-fi.”

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DINING & DRINKING ON GRAND LAKE UPDATE: Shangri-La is hosting open-to-the-public Shrimp Boils and Karaoke every Thursday night from 6:00-9:00 in “The Cave” on the patio at Doc’s Bar & Grill. “At the lake, we do beer-thirty at wine o’clock.”

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RANDY KREHBIEL’S RANDOM FACTOID OF THE WEEK: Theodore Roosevelt thought the use of "In God We Trust" on U.S. coinage bordered on blasphemy and during his presidency tried unsuccessfully to have it removed. "In God We Trust" did not appear on paper currency until 1957.

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BEST FACEBOOK POST OF THE WEEK: Health insurance is like a bikini. It costs a lot, but it doesn’t cover much.

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BEST SIGN SEEN THIS WEEK: Happy unsticking your thighs from a plastic chair season.

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BEST PUN OF THE WEEK: Yesterday I spotted an albino Dalmation. It was the least I could have done for him.

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SAGE ADVICE FROM AN OLD MAN: “I’ve often been asked ‘what do you old folks do now that you’re retired?’ Well…I’m fortunate to have a background in chemical engineering and one of the things I enjoy most is converting beer, wine, and vodka into urine. I do it every day and I really enjoy it!”

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TWEET OF THE WEEK: The only guy who calls and checks on me every day is the guy from India who wants to discuss my car warranty.

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OBSERVATION OF THE WEEK: Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.

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NEWS OF THE WEEK: Illinois last week became the 11th state to legalize marijuana for recreational use.

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FEEL-OLD MOMENT OF THE WEEK: You know you’re getting old when you start to notice little gray hairs in your children’s hair.

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GRAND LAKE BUM SHOUT-OUTS: Happy birthday wishes go out this week to Bob Beine, Dick Seybolt, Alyson Aberle, Velma Mullen, Jimbo Coleman, Valoyce Musgrove, Virginia Gibson, David Hitzeman, Stephanie Young, Patsy Williams, Rod Wadel, Judy Phillips, Brian Ruth, Jack Doney, Arlita Raby, Toby Keith, Sheri Stoner, Terry Jones, Kerry Kimmons, Kelly Whitehead…and AMERICA. Happy birthday!

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UNANSWERED QUESTION OF THE WEEK: What disease infected ham before it was cured?

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BEST EVENTS OF THE WEEK: There is something going on every day, everywhere you look this week. Wednesday night is the Wolf Creek Celebration & Fireworks Show in Grove as well as the Vinita Fireworks. Thursday night is the night of the Duck Creek Fireworks Show on South Grand, Jay Fireworks, and Miami Fireworks, as well as the 4th of July Shrimp Boil & Karaoke on the patio at Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La on Monkey Island. Friday night is the Lake Fireworks Display at Disney, as well as the Horse Creek Fireworks, and the Friday Night Shrimp Boil at Harbors View Marina. Saturday is the Family Fun Festival at Shangri-La followed by the Monkey Island Fireworks Show. Saturday is also the Summer Fun Fest at Grand Meridian RV Park beginning at 5:00.

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GRAND LAKE WEEKEND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT: There’s great entertainment all around the lake this weekend. On Monkey Island, Jason Morgan will kick off the weekend at Doc’s Patio at Shangri-La Thursday at 6:00 with DJ and karaoke fun with Jason Morgan combined with the weekly Thursday night Shrimp Boil. As part of the Family Fun Festival at Shangri-La immediately preceding the Monkey Island Fireworks, music will be provided by Max McQuirk and Maximum Entertainment. The Travis Marvin Band will be on stage Saturday night at Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina. The Balcony Bar at The Shebang is open Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights this week for karaoke fun and there’s great dance music featuring DJ $way right across the street at Big Shots Rhythm & Booze Thursday-Saturday nights. There is also great dance music at Monkey Island Pub with The Full Monty on stage Saturday night. At the Blind Swine, DJ Flip entertains with karaoke Thursday night, and Erin Fitzgibbon will be on stage Friday night followed by DJ Deeko. Saturday night, Diversity will entertain; and Sunday nights are Open Jam Sessions for musicians at the Swine. At Littlefield Corner, there’s always great live music Saturday night at Road Hog Saloon.

On South Grand Lake, KJ Flip will furnish the tunes Thursday night at Harbors View Marina for Duck Creek Fireworks night. Friday, Megan Faulconer will entertain during Harbors View’s Friday Night Shrimp Boil. Summer Fun Fest is Saturday at Grand Meridian RV Park beginning at 5:00 with entertainment by Lickitty Split, Megan Faulconer, and The George Brothers. Juan Montez at Red Arrow Marina features entertainment on the deck including Barrett Lewis Saturday night. Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina features music by Mike Barham & the Honky Tonk Prophets Friday night followed by South of Vertical Saturday.

Area casinos have big entertainment plans, too. Cherokee Casino Grove features the music of Christiana Thursday night, followed by Rosy Hips Friday night and FM Live Saturday.  At Bordertown Casino’s Lost Creek Saloon, you are the star at Thursday night karaoke, and Brent Giddens will be on stage at Bordertown Friday night.  At River Bend Casino’s Club 60 West, Bobby DeGonia performs live Friday night and DJ 5Star Entertainment will provide the music Saturday. Downstream Casino’s Outdoor Venue features a special performance by Jake Owen Saturday night. At Buffalo Run Casino’s Trailer Park Bar & Grill there is live DJ action every Friday & Saturday night at 10:00. Indigo Sky Casino offers three nights of musical entertainment this week. Brett & Terri perform Thursday night in the Echo Bar, followed by Big Smitty Friday night and Soul DeVille Saturday.

The best spots to catch all your favorite sports action are Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort, the Standing Room Only Bar at The Shebang, Blind Swine, Road Hog Saloon, 1909 in Grove, Pickles at the Lake in Langley, and Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney.

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BUM MUST-SEE TV: A Capitol Fourth airs Thursday night at 7:00 on PBS and Living Grand on Grand Lake airs at 7:30 on RSU-TV. There are a couple of new shows worth checking out next Tuesday night – Love Island at 7:00 on CBS and Bring the Funny at 9:00 on NBC. The 2019 Espy Awardswill be carried live at 7:00 next Wednesday on ABC.

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BUM MUST-SEE MOVIES: Yesterday and Phil

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QUOTE OF THE WEEK: “No amount of evidence will ever persuade an idiot.” – Mark Twain

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SAVE THE DATE: Thursday, July 11 – Shrimp Boil and Karaoke on the patio at Doc’s at Shangri-La Resort. Saturday-Sunday, July 13-14 – SDBA Drag Boat Races in Wolf Creek. Thursday, July 18 – Grove Chamber of Commerce Annual Banquet at Big Shots on Monkey Island (Lt. Governor Matt Pinnell speaking). Thursday-Saturday, July 18-20 – Oklahoma Legislative Grand Lake Family Getaway Weekend. Saturday, July 20 – Grand Bobber Drop. Saturday, July 20 – Oklahoma Legislative Golf Tournament at Shangri-La. Saturday, July 20 – Aquapalooza adjacent to Grand Lake RV Resort in Duck Creek. Saturday, July 27 – Cobalt Splash Bash in Ketchum Cove. Saturday, August 31 – Redneck Raftout in Check-In Bay.

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It’s the biggest time of the year for the world of professional tennis. Wimbledon competition continues daily this week. Round 2 Thursday, round 3 Friday, Round of 16 Monday, Women’s quarterfinals Tuesday and Men’s quarterfinals Wednesday. You’ll have to be dedicated to catch it all, though. Coverage on ESPN begins at 5:00 a.m. and continues through mid-afternoon. There is a more reasonably timed telecast of highlights Sunday afternoon at 2:00.

The PGA Tour arrives in the Twin Cities this week for the 3M Open. Coverage begins on the Golf Channel at 1:00 Thursday & Friday and noon Saturday & Sunday. CBS picks up coverage of the final two rounds at 2:00 Saturday & Sunday.

Team USA has made it to the semi-finals of the FIFA World Cup competition. Looks like they might have a shot at winning it all. They play England Tuesday at 2:00 (ESPN).

NASCAR drivers are at Daytona this week for some Saturday night prime time racing. Coverage of the Coke Zero Sugar 400 begins at 6:30 Saturday evening on NBC.

There’s some good Major League Baseball action on the tube this week beginning Thursday with the Cubs at Pittsburgh (3:00) and Philadelphia at Atlanta (6:00), both on ESPN. Saturday the Angels are at Houston (6:00 on Fox) and Colorado is at Arizona (9:00 on FS1). Sunday, the Yankees are at Tampa Bay at noon (TBS) leading up to the All-Star break. The All-Star Game is Tuesday night at 6:30 on Fox.

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The holiday weekend weather for Grand Lake looks pretty good with light winds, partly cloudy skies, highs in the mid-80s and lows around 70. There’s a chance of a few thunderstorms scattered here and there, but hopefully they won’t arrive at Grand during any of the many fireworks shows.  Enjoy a Grand Lake weekend of holiday celebration!  Remember, though… be sure to buy a drink for the guy next to you. It could be me.

GRAND LAKE BUM

Want more information on advertisers you see in the Grand Lake Bum?  No problem.  Just click on their ad and you will be connected to their web site.  If you would like to join the growing list of sponsors of The Grand Lake Bum e-blast and the Bum’s page on both grandlakenewsonline.com and www.360grandlake.com, as well as Grand Times on Grand Lake, the cost is only $50 a week and the list of readers is growing.  E-mail or contact grandlakebum@gmail.com to sign up. The Grand Lake Bum column is also published in The Grand Laker.

Looking for places to go, things to do, services to use or property to buy in the Grand Lake area?  Here’s a starter kit listing of “open to the public” fun places to spend time at Grand Lake.

1909 in Downtown Grove

Ailey’s Café in Langley

American Grill in Grove

Aquabar & Grill at The Landings Marina on Monkey Island (smoking on the deck)

Artichoke Restaurant & Bar in Langley

Balcony Bar at The Shebang (Smoking – open Friday & Saturday nights)

Big Shots on Monkey Island (Open Friday & Saturday nights)

Blind Swine on Monkey Island

Blue Bluff Café at Blue Bluff Harbor

Buffalo Run Casino in Miami (smoking)

Café Italia on Monkey Island

Café Yum in Grove

Carlos Montez in Langley (smoking in bar)

Ceasar’s Place in Vinita and at Littlefield Corner

Checkered Past in Grove

Chickanella’s in Grove

Chicken Coop West of Langley

Clanton’s Café in Vinita

Coffee Shelter in Ketchum

Cosby’s Catfish on Highway 28 in Eucha (East of Disney)

Doc’s Bar & Grill at Shangri-La Resort Hotel

Docks Bar at Harbors View Marina

Downstream Casino in Quapaw (smoking)

Drake’s on the Lake at Blue Bluff Harbor

Drake’s Restaurant in Grove

Eddy’s Lakeside Bar at Shangri-La Marina (smoking)

Gabby’s Place in downtown Grove

Goodfella’s Pizza (Cleora and Grove)

Grand Lake Casino, north of Grove on Highway 10 (smoking)

Grand Lake Public House in Grove

Hatfield’s Saloon in Grove

Henrie’s Grill in Grove

High Winds Casino east of Miami (smoking)

Indigo Sky Casino west of Seneca, Mo. (smoking)

Juan Montez Restaurant & Cantina at Red Arrow Marina

La Casita de Martin in downtown Grove

Lighthouse Supper Club in Ketchum

Los Garcias in Langley

Lupe's Mexican Restaurant in Grove

Monkey Island Pub (Smoking)

Monkey’s Uncle at Littlefield Corner (Breakfast & lunch)

Mooney’s Sunset Bar & Grill in Disney (smoking, etc.)

Mulligan’s at Patricia Island Golf Club in Grove

Nu Taste Restaurant in Grove

Pappy’s Bar on Hwy 10 east of Grove

Pickles at the Lake in Langley

Pit Stop Café in Grove

Quarterdeck Cafe at Tera Miranda Harbor (smoking on the deck)

Raggedy’s in Grove

Rancho Viejo in Grove

Riggs & Company in Langley

River Bend Casino in Wyandotte (smoking)

Road Hog Saloon at the entrance to Monkey Island (smoking...but not at lunch)

Rusty Anchor (next to the cliffs at Dripping Springs)

Scooters in Langley (smoking)

Sharky’s at Hammerhead Marina (smoking)

Sticky Fingers Barbecue in Ketchum

Stuffn’s Restaurant in Ketchum (Smoking on patio)

The Grill at Indian Hills Resort & Marina in Bernice

The Landings Marina (smoking on the deck)

The Landings Market and Grill on Monkey Island (smoking on the patio)

The Parrot at Honey Creek Landing in Grove (Smoking on the patio)

The Stables Casino in Miami (smoking)

The Shebang on Monkey Island (smoking on patio and Balcony Bar)

Ugly’s Grill & Bar, Thunder Bay Marina (smoking)

VIP Pizza at Hammerhead Marina (smoking on deck)

Water Side Bar & Grill in Grove

Waterway Café, Harbors View Marina (smoking on breakwater dining deck)

Wolf Creek Diner in Grove

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